Tag Archives: current-events

Getting away with being a really horrible person: A how-to guide… step 2…

Congratulations! You did it! You became a world-class douche-nozzle, a life-sized human phlegm statue, a vile, despicable, low-life piece of swamp vermin! Good job! Now we can get into the actual lesson plan for how to get away with all … Continue reading →

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Getting away with being a really horrible person: A how-to guide… step 1…

Step one is actually the hardest part. In order to get away with being a really horrible person, first, you have to become a really horrible person… unless you already are a really horrible person, and then, well, you came … Continue reading →

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Against all enemies, both foreign and domestic…

I am going to make one more attempt to tell you how close we are to becoming a totalitarian state with a dictator as our leader. Because I don’t think most people really see the threat looming over us. But … Continue reading →

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Stop telling us you are the ‘real America’, tRump supporters!!!

Because you aren’t. This country was established under the premise of freedom of religion for everybody, not just white Christians. Yes, we had slavery, but we fought a war to end it, and then fought political battles to make all … Continue reading →

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An open letter to the ‘good’ people who voted for tRump…

You decided to overlook his racist comments and followers, even though you aren’t a racist. You ignored his statements about women, even though you aren’t a sexist. You ignored his mocking of a disabled reporter, even though you have empathy … Continue reading →

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So you elected an asshole: A survival guide… the final solution… uh… I mean chapter…

I know I already made the joke about disguising yourself as a tRump supporter in order to make it through the next four years, but I could never do that. I was going to finish this series with the joke … Continue reading →

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So you elected an asshole: A survival guide… part 14…

I honestly don’t have any good Trump-era survival tips for my female readers. I wish I did… I have two daughters… and a wife… and a mom. Despite Trump’s claims that he promotes women in his companies and treats them … Continue reading →

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So you elected an asshole: A survival guide… part 13…

Invest your money in wall-building materials, taco trucks, and giant, gold letter T’s… but don’t actually drive around in the truck… that might get you deported… hire some Trump supporters to do that.

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So you elected an asshole: A survival guide… part 12…

Learn to breathe underwater… or grow gills… because, you know… unrestricted corporations, a gutted EPA run by climate change deniers, no oversight or ethics at all when it comes to the things that are causing global warming… I am in … Continue reading →

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So you elected an asshole: A survival guide… part 11…

Get healthy… now… because, you know… no health care…

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