It’s not yesterday anymore, is it?

No… it isn’t. It is just before five in the morning… and I am sitting at my mom’s house… the first of the horde to awaken… trying to do a post or two about yesterday’s adventures in the Bay Area… before we leave to have more adventures… and I fall even further behind.

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So, I mentioned in the last post from last night that we went to the city and walked on the Golden Gate bridge. I have a lot of pictures of that, so maybe the next couple of posts after this one will just be mostly pictures, and I will do the back story now.

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To get to the city, we took the Richmond bridge… with it’s lovely view of San Quentin, the super-max federal penitentiary. I know, we could have gone the other way, and crossed the Oakland bridge, but we like to mix it up.

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This also meant that we drove over the Golden Gate bridge… before coming back to walk on it.

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I saw a ship coming into the bay, and… well, sometimes I like to mess with my camera, and see what it will try to focus on… this time I made it choose between the bridge railings zipping by and a ship in the distance. That is kind of an artsy shot, don’t you think?

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We went to this guys house! Yes, that is Big Johnny. We call him that because I am six feet four inches tall and he makes me look normal-sized. Best man at our wedding… childhood friend of my wife originally from San Diego, like her, which explains why I live there now… and father of our godchild. Also, the guy whose 50th birthday party was the reason for my last visit to the Bay Area, and some pretty awesome drunken adventures, in case you missed those posts.

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Okay, that is Dashawn, playing our godson, Willie, like a guitar. Willie took to him right away, which makes me like Dashawn even more, (remember, I always say, don’t trust anybody if dogs, horses, babies and little kids don’t like them)… which is good, because he is dating Mollie, our 17-year-old. Don’t let the 49’ers jacket fool you. He has never been to the Bay Area before. He flew down to share in the Browne family Christmas madness, because, for Christmas, my wife and daughter got him tickets to a 49’ers game… and he is a huge fan. Don’t worry, they are going with him.

The thing is… (yay, another thing!!!)… we don’t always do all the touristy stuff every time we come here. I grew up here. We come here, to the Bay Area, I mean, at least a few times every year. But it is kind of awesome to do the touristy stuff with somebody who has never been here.

Oh, and while we were walking to get lunch later in the day, a homeless guy yelled: “Nice jacket” at him, and it made his day.

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After Willie showed us his new Christmas presents… I know, Wookie jammies and mask with a furry Ewok ear hat… very confusing…

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… and his sweet, new ride, an all-terrain tricycle…  Ha! I just noticed his shadow… it looks like a lizard on a bike!

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So anyway, I still have a bunch of pictures of the bridge, and an adventure to the elementary school that I went to when I was little, to do some cool stuff, and see an awesome sunset… but soon, a house full of… uh… I think there are 12… or 14 people here now, I can’t count them, they keep moving around… are going to start getting up, and we are going to the city again, (not all of us)… because my older daughter… yes, Jessica… and her fiance, Jason, are leaving today. I sort of hope we take a day off tomorrow to relax.. if you can call being in a house this full of people relaxing.

But if I don’t take a shower now, I will never get to.

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See that bridge… we totally walked on that today…

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What, you don’t believe me?

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Okay, technically, that was taken just before we walked out onto the bridge… How about this…

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You can’t fake that. The thing is… (hi, thing, how ya been?)… that we had adventures all around the Bay Area today, but I am now sleepy, and we are going back to the city tomorrow for more adventures… so I am going to be another day behind by tomorrow night. These three photos are just a small sample of today. That’s the best I can do right now. We are going to have a busy week, you and I.

 

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Christmas dinner… number two…

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I am not making this stuff up. Every year, at my mom’s house in the San Francisco Bay Area, we have two Christmas dinners… exactly the same. That guy in the corner, stretching his neck, is my brother, Henry. He, and his wife and three kids show up the day after Christmas, because of stuff with his wife’s family. You might remember him, we used to be in a band together.

Wait, let me backtrack, because this all took place yesterday. After our trip to the science museum with our godson and his mom, they stopped by my mom’s house…

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We had to give Willie our presents.

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The superhero walkie talkies were a big hit.

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And Willie totally took down my younger daughter’s boyfriend.

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There was more of our awesome Christmas bread, just like the day before…

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There was another huge roast beef… just like on Christmas day… with lots of baby potatoes.

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I know, it isn’t as bloody rare as it is supposed to be, but the one the day before was…

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Bear in mind that by the second Christmas dinner, there are usually 12 to 16 people at my mom’s house… and I mean sleeping here, not just to eat the dinner.

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And we have Yorkshire pudding… maybe not the big ones in a single pan you were thinking of if you are English… we do small, individual ones.

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And the whole table is rest, complete with the crackers… with little explosions and bad toys and jokes and paper crowns.

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Yup… we do all of this… twice… two whole days of cooking… because those of us that show up before Christmas want a Christmas, and the people who show up late do too. We even open presents on two separate days.

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And that is why I have these pictures of half a plum pudding being lit on fire for the second time. Nobody really eats that much plum pudding… it is just an excuse to eat hard sauce… which is just powdered sugar, butter and hard liquor.

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There, we made it through yesterday… now, we have a bunch of cool photos of today, and we did some cool stuff today, and I won’t get to most of it until tomorrow…

We have a lot to do.

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I finally took a good photo of a flaming plum pudding!!!

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It is not easy to do, because, if you use the flash, you can’t see the fire, but if you don’t, the shutter is open for a long time, and any movement makes the picture blurry. Technically speaking, that is only half of a plum pudding… because this is our second Christmas dinner… Hobbits have second breakfasts… Brownes have second Christmas dinner. And we had ours last night… but I have to get ready to go to San Francisco for more adventures, so… I will have to share that with you later.

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Yeah, I know, more pictures of the San Francisco Bay Area… and me…

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I took these when we went up to the science museum yesterday…

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Yes! Very good! This is the same spot I came with my mom, and took the photos of the awesome sunset, the last time I was in the Bay Area for Big Johnny’s birthday party, which I also took some cool pictures of. You really are paying attention.

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And you are absolutely right! Big Johnny is Willie’s dad… and Willie, our godson, was with us yesterday when we went to the science museum.

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See, I told you. If you read my whole blog from the beginning, you will know me better than you know anybody else on the planet… maybe even yourself.

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My daughter, Mollie, took the camera, and I made her take a couple shots of me. She was really trying to take pictures of her boyfriend, who is suffering… I mean ‘enjoying’ his first Browne family Christmas at my mom’s house… did I mention there are like 16 or more people living here right now?

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So… yeah…

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The notable thing about these photos of the Bay Area, taken from way up in the Berkeley hills, is how clear it is… wait… let me put the zoom lens on…

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You see that island, way out past the right tower of the Golden Gate bridge? Those are the Farallon  Islands. They are 43 miles out to sea. I can count the number of times in my entire life that I saw them from this spot on one hand… and not the whole hand. There is almost always some fog or clouds or haze blocking them from your view.

Bonus points if your remembered that the Sea Scout boat I was on was named after the Farallon Islands… yes, the one I almost died on, and posted about here, probably the most interesting and funny near-death story ever… you should really try typing something about ‘near death experience’ or ‘drowning’ in the search bar. That is a crazy story, but I can’t remember the name of the post. But you really are paying attention, and here I was, thinking that you just hit the ‘like’ button after skimming through my posts. I do apologize.

And as long as I have the zoom lens on…

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Because, in a few hours, we are going to be all up in that city over there, having more adventures. I know, I haven’t even shared the pictures of our ‘second Christmas’ dinner last night. I am falling behind.

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So, yeah, we saw Willie!

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Look at our godson, in his little Viking helmet knit cap! His mom brought him over from San Francisco, and we all went to the science museum.

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He showed me one of his favorite Christmas presents… yup… a rubber poo…

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He turned it into a poop gun… because he’s 4…

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I have to say, rubber poo technology has not advanced very far… I am not impressed by the color or the seam down the side.

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But we had fun with this thing!

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And Jessica and Jason had fun learning about air flow over various fan and propeller blades…

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But mostly… squashing your own face.

And now, I have to get ready for our second Christmas dinner… exactly like the first. I will explain tomorrow… if I have time, but we have a big day of adventures planned, and I am falling behind.

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Wait… is that Willie???

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Why yes, it is our little godson, Willie!

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It ain’t Han Solo frozen in carbonite!

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There is nothing more satisfying than sticking your face in one of those things, then running around to the other side and smushing your own face.

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I did it too.

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Wait… who is that beside me? Is that Dashawn, Mollie’s boyfriend?

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Why yes, yes it is. He is in the Bay Area with us. He flew in this morning. Okay, details later. Gotta give Willie his presents.

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Back in Bay Area…

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Don’t think that all we are doing in the Bay Area is Christmas stuff. We went for a walk yesterday.

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I love walking in the town where I grew up. You can’t beat the views.

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And I do love the fact that my sort-of-new laptop allows me to share the adventures on a day to day basis, rather than doing 500 posts when I get home. Look, it is only the morning of the day after Christmas, and I am all caught up with our adventures, and will have to go have some new ones.

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Also, I love the fact that the Bay Area is full of whimsical touches, like houses painted in wild colors and… uh… this house dragon.

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Anyway, thanks for going on this journey with me.

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I like that picture. I may or may not have been trying to focus on the little bit of Golden Gate bridge you can see between the trees, but it came out as very artsy.

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Okay, I have to get ready for more adventures.

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One last gratuitous photo of Jessica and her fiance, Jason, at the end of the walk.

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Why yes, that is a little pillow with my head on it… oh, yeah! (Or): What I got for Christmas!!!

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My older daughter, Jessica, made it for me. It took a long time. Also, because she had to use some computer magic to order the thread to do the hand-stitching, she now knows, scientifically, exactly how grey my hair is… sigh…

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Some of you are thinking; why do you want a pillow with your face on it? You are obviously new around here. I am the guy who is carving a tiki that looks exactly like my gravatar image… nobody loves my face like I do.

Others among you are saying to yourselves; hey, that picture looks familiar. That is because she used this image…

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Yes, it is the picture from my awesome business card. It is also a photo of me that was taken on Maui, where my wife and I went for our second honeymoon, and I blogged all about it.

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I got lots of other cool stuff too. A Donald Trump paper doll book that makes fun of him! No way. We will have fun with that when I get back to San Diego. I might make some ‘special’ outfits for him. It will be a nice change from all the Photoshop pics I do making fun of him. And I got a new power tool… to help me make tikis faster… and speaking of tikis…

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The two tikis I gave my mom a long time ago are wearing their Christmas finery!

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I love the idea of incorporating pagan bits into a religious festival that is already a mishmash of Christian and pagan rituals. Anyway, I got other cool stuff too, and it was an awesome Christmas, and there are lot more adventures coming… but really… how do you top this?

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What, you don’t have English Christmas crackers for your Christmas???

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You don’t know about those crazy English cardboard tubes with a small explosive charge that goes off when you pull the ends, and then, inside, is a paper crown, a lame toy, and a piece of paper with bad jokes on it?

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That tube in the fancy red Christmas wrapping beside the fork is a cracker… although, sometimes, I call them poppers.

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So everybody gets a cracker beside their place setting, and you all pull them with a loud pop… or crack… somewhere near the desert course… you know… after the roast beef and Yorkshire pudding, but before the plum pudding… what, you don’t have that stuff either? I will try to explain more about English Christmas California style later… because we do it all over again tomorrow… it’s a long story, I will get to that too… but I am already falling behind on my Bay Area Christmas adventure, and I haven’t even shown you the presents I got, and it is already after dinner… I will have to do that tomorrow.

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That’s what I got in my cracker this year… a tiny badminton set… the toys are getting worse.

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That is what a plum pudding looks like… which is why we soak it in booze and set it on fire…

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Sorry it is a bad picture… low lighting… it was dark… I will try to get a better picture tomorrow… I told you, we do the whole thing twice…

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And there is my older daughter, Jessica… playing with the tiny rubber hands I got in my Christmas stocking… and there is Jason, the guy who is marrying her in less than four months… wondering if that is still a good idea…

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Yeah, I can’t really explain a Browne family Christmas. Did I mention there is going to be about 18 people living at my mom’s house for the next few days? Try to keep up.

 

 

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