Yeah… it has tie dye-wearing ninja assassins from another dimension, trying to kill the hero… which, as it turns out, is me… but not this me, a me in even another dimension… Okay, the little bear isn’t really in the story… I just added that for fun… wait, I take that back, there are some aliens that our hero calls ‘Rainbow Bears’ that have a dark secret, so that little bear does sort of work in that context.
You also get to meet an alien who learned to speak English by watching Monty Python’s Flying Circus reruns and can only speak using lines from their skits… which is how I met Mr. Eric Idle on Twitter, and struck up a friendship, and got him to follow me on Twitter, but that is another story… And you meet an abominable snowman alien, and a bunch of human supremacists who hate aliens and alien supremacists who hate humans… but both those groups live right next to each other…
Oh, and you get to meet Fawnya…
… who isn’t actually green, but rather blue, but I did this picture before I decided what color she was going to be… and her mate, Fadoodoo, who both live in a big volcano made of their own poop… although, technically, we never really do find out in the book whether or not it is actually their poop or not, and tend to speak like Russian spies from a bad Cold War movie.
And all this takes place as the hero… who is, once again, me… takes a walk around a giant alien space station called the Hubb… being chased by alien and human assassins sent from another dimension because our hero has screwed up the plans of an evil dictator who rules that dimension to come and invade his dimension. And because our hero is sarcastic and lazy and takes nothing seriously and hates responsibility… (once again, he is me, after all)… he is shirking his new duties as CEO of the largest alien/human intergalactic corporation in the history of any dimension… which the American president sort of forced him to take on, after he saved the alien space station from space pirates… in the first book… and saved San Francisco from being blown up by the old CEO of the corporation… in the second book… and now, because all his exploits were televised to the entire universe, and he is the darling of billions of living beings, he is sulking and taking a vacation… which is bad, because that invasion I told you about, it is still going to happen. The good news is that he put all his human and alien poker buddies in charge of the company while he is off being juvenile, which, as it turns out, was a really good idea.
Hey, not bad for a guy who started off as the janitor at a Texas-style bar on the alien space station.
So… uh… yeah… just go over to the sidebar and click on the picture of this book…
…0r the pictures of the other two books… and a link will take you to a magic place where they will print a copy of those books… or of my famous children’s book; I Like Monkeys… on actual paper made from actual dead trees… and send them right to your house.
