Why I want Conan the barbarian to come to my house for Christmas… a recycled post from the past…

You all know I love that big, crazy barbarian. But you may be asking yourself why I would think it would be fun to have him around during the holiday season. Well let me break it down for you.

In the first place, Conan is always ready for any adventure that involves chopping. So you know he will help you get a really good Christmas tree…

a1Also, I think that Conan would really rock the Santa look…

a2Ho ho ho indeed.

And from a guy’s point of view, I bet Conan would give the kinds of gifts that a man really likes to get…

a5Oh Conan, you are so silly. That isn’t what I meant and you know it. My wife isn’t going to let me keep that. You do like your little jokes…

a4That’s what I’m talking about. Much better than that ugly sweater with the red reindeer nose that actually lights up that I got from… never mind…

So go ahead. Put a little barbarian in your festivities this year. Liven things up. You don’t have to sip your eggnog from the hollowed out skull of a foe you crushed under your heel. But don’t be afraid to try something new or let your emotions show. Let the wild part that is inside all of us just a little closer to the surface. And live your holiday like you mean it…

a3Merry Christmas Conan, wherever you are.

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Have I mentioned that I freekin’ love my Photoshop?

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Because I do… I really do…

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Uh… I sort of want this on my head…

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I found this picture when I was looking for funny haircuts to stick on top of that skull. I might have to do that. That is what I call a reptile dysfunction.

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DAY OF THE DEAD plant… and the winner is…

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I guess I will replace the dead plant with another plant… what?… don’t judge me… it’s totally legal in California now…

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DAY OF THE DEAD plant… part 15…

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We could try for a more season-specific look…

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DAY OF THE DEAD plant… part 14…

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I am fairly sure I can find tiny wigs in a craft store… you know… for dolls…

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And I threw in a gratuitous picture of Cuca in a fro wig… the same one I put on Trump not too long ago. I didn’t put a Trump wig on Cuca… Racha would never have forgiven me.

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DAY OF THE DEAD plant… part 13…

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What about something a little more Doctor Who-ie? Sorry, I didn’t add a bow tie. He doesn’t have a neck.

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DAY OF THE DEAD plant… part 12…

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What about putting a full-sized tree up there? I mean, we will probably have to re-renovate the house… but still…

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DAY OF THE DEAD plant… part 11…

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There seems to be some confusion about what is happening in this series of posts. I’m sure it is my fault, but let me clear up the confusion.

A couple of months ago, while shopping for something for the home renovation, I was at a large home improvement store called Home Depot. I had, not too long before, done a series of posts about the Mexican Dia De Los Muertos… the Day of the Dead celebration… and the art associated with it… you can search that if you want… it was back when our relatives were visiting from England.

Anyway, while I was at the store, I spotted these two skulls… for only $5.99 each. Even though they are made in China, they are obviously Dia De Los Muertos inspired. They are about the size of a tennis ball, and each will nestle in the palm of my hand.

I named them Cuca… that’s the white one with the mustache… and Racha. This is a joke, because in Spanish, cucaracha means cockroach.

Glued to the top of their heads were little plants. The skulls are not hollow. There is no dirt. These plants come from the rain forest, and are sometimes called ‘air plants’. They can grow in the tops of large jungle trees, and get most of their water through the leaves, not the roots, which are used to grip the trees.

When we started moving back into our house after the remodel, I left my little friends at my mother-in-law’s house, where we had stayed for almost two months. One way or another… and I am not blaming my mother-in-law… even though both plants were doing fine the last time I saw them… (plants, like babies and animals, love me)… But she brought them over one day, and the next day, the plant of Cuca’s head just fell off. It had taken the day of the dead theme a little too literally.

Now… for what ever reason… I am doing a series of funny Photoshop posts with ideas of what to replace the plant with.

And you are supposed to be voting on what would be the best choice… and feel free to come up with funny suggestions for this… it is an interactive blog, after all.

 

 

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DAY OF THE DEAD plant… part 10…

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I haven’t entirely ruled out the idea of using a tiny wig to replace the dead plant…

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