Here are some more of the clever things I say on Twitter, just in case you aren’t doing the tweety thing yet…

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*Oh, what a tangled World Wide Web we weave…

*When my cup runneth over, I just see another mess to clean up… sigh…

*We all come from the same little tribe… you can’t be a racist without hating yourself… we are one race… the human race…

*It is a finger of speech… no, that isn’t a typo… I am giving you the finger of speech…

*Getting a tweet reply from William Shatner is the closest I will ever get to fame… until they make my sci-fi books into a movie with him in it…

*Help, I’ve fallen and I can’t get up… unfortunately, I’ve fallen in love… so the not being able to get up part really sucks…

*Americans like to put people up on a pedestal… and then start kicking it…

*It is never too late to start making the world a better place… I am thinking of taking a nap…

*Good news! I talked the aliens out of invading your planet… you’re welcome…

*I like the way you look at my words… it makes me feel all warm and squishy inside…

*I had a pet peeve once… it died… I didn’t know what to feed it… and don’t even ask about the Playtex living bra…

*So, do I come here often, baby?

*Okay, fine, you can follow me, but you have to go in front when it gets dangerous…

*Dear terrorists… get a PR firm… killing people is not going to make us agree with your point of view…

*Have you ever hitched up your britches with a little too much enthusiasm? Ow.

*My stiff upper lip just cracked under the pressure…

*Stop hanging around waiting for me to be funny… I can’t work under this kind of pressure…

*Mother Nature is such a showoff…

*Today is the big day… naw, I’m just kidding, it’s the same size as all the others…