***WARNING***
This post contains bad words… lots of bad words. It is yet another shameless and cynical attempt on my part to get more hits and boost my stats… because I had one slow day and you know how I panic… I am just doing this to lure perverts who troll the internet using sick and twisted search terms to fulfill their disgusting desires to my blog. But hey, their hits count on my stats the same as anyone else, and once again, in my defense, it will distract them for at least a few seconds from looking at pictures of shaved sheep doing unspeakable things…
If you are one of my regular followers… if that isn’t a contradiction in terms… please ignore the rest of this post.
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Naked. Sexy. Sex. Beaver. Boob. Take it all off. Do it. Need. Harder. Deeper. Faster. Longer. Viagra. Nude. Huge. Wet. Damp. Moist. Hairy. Shaved. More. Groin. Crotch. Muffin. Clam. Mounds. Hump. Plunge. Ram. Cram. Explicit. Nude. Uninhibited. Bang. Screw. Hot. Steamy. Turgid. Rigid. Flesh. Skin. Unclothed. Girls. Ladies. Women. Woman. Beg. Dominate. Hooters. Melons. Gazongas. Jugs. Chest. Nipple. Nibble. Gyrate. Wiggle. Squirm. On top. Get down. Get up. Dirty. Nasty. Touch. Feel. Grab. Squeeze. Caress. Hold. Stroke. Hard. Soft. Bite. Lick. Swallow. Juicy. Climax.
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Once again, my apologies.
I doubt this will get me freshly pressed.
So here we
Pouring My Art Out 
It is funny you should say regular followers. I think that has more contradictions than one.
For instance, your regular followers are probably used to knowing the colour of your ink. They only have to imagine how possibly dark the shade of the colour is.
Also, my followers are firm believers in dietary fiber, so they are regular in that sense.
I guess it’s worth believing in your followers for their faiths in you. So don’t think they’ll hesitate before eating shit with you next time.
Even if they may not end up doing so, in practice.
I have snacks in the lobby…
And when you run out?
Read my new post…
Oh what men would do!!!
I will, anyway.
Umm, I use all these words on a regular basis. The only person they get to come to my blog is… you. Huh.
That isn’t how I found you at all.
Ha. How DID you find me?
Oh, I saw you around and followed you home. It was in the comments somewhere. Maybe Ed Hotspur or El Guapo or Twindaddy or someone.
Well, it’s hard not to follow a pair of sparkly lips home. Or a pair of something, anyways…
Sparkly somethings?
I’ll never tell.
Me neither…
I think I know how you lost followers. People read backwards, like me, and they were put off by your warped humor and shameless soliciting. Really, you are just a little numbers slut!
I have reasons behind that besides just being a cheap ho-bag.
Ho-bag, much more appealing.
I would hope so.
Aptly out, R.Jones.
I am tempted to try some of these search terms to see if they lead me to your blog….
Well they might now…
LMAO…turgid..ew.
I do what I can…
Isn’t it interesting that most of those high-hit words are usually perfectly innocent? Most of them, if you hadn’t told us to think dirty, wouldn’t do anything for most people; but put them in a list of ‘dirty’ concepts, and I need a cold shower now!
Anything can be made to sound dirty… if you try hard enough… oh… sorry…
You missed a great opportunity. But I’ll give you the second paragraph you needed so you can still get an even worse array of people coming by. Here we go.
Oprah Winfrey, George Bush, Barack Obama, Anthony Weiner, Kermit the Frog, Hillary Clinton, Justin Bieber, Honey Boo Boo, The Olsen Twins, Michael Moore, Betty White, Nancy Pelosi, Roseanne, Cat Cora, Masaharu Morimoto, Strom Thurmond, Adolf Hitler, Luciano Pavarotti, Mickey Mouse, Tom Bergeron
(Just imagine visitors mixing and matching words from your list and mine. And then picture the “bad google searches” post you can write as a result.)
The funny thing is that this isn’t going to get me search terms that are as weird as the ones I already get. If you just looked at the ones involving the word ‘mustache’ it would blow your mind.
Oh man. You should be freshly pressed for this. It’s like jumping into a hot steaming swimming pool of dirty fluids. Well, I have done my part to help your viewership, I will now go and have a shower and possibly brush my teeth. Also, please remember that perverts are people too. I think your post could be a wonderful starting point for a discussion on the wonders of true perversion.
It isn’t like they have a shortage of real sites to visit.
I dunno, this one fits the bill pretty good.
maybe
Seriously? You are weird.
No I’m not…
Then what are you?
I am many things to many people, that’s what I am.
LMFAO dude! I hope it helps. But you’re not the only one willing to get outrageous to boost blog views. Just check out my A Little “Hump Day” Animation post. Of course, I’d post stuff like that everyday id I weren’t afraid it would scare my (handful of) regulars away! 😀
That was… interesting.