Pouring My Art Out

It’s all about me… (and I am for the birds)… Part 5…

Posted on July 8, 2014 by pouringmyartout

So I met some awesome birds when we were on Maui for our second honeymoon.

There was this cool little pet shop in Lahaina town, and the lady let me play with my new friends.

She was surprised that all the birds liked me… but I wasn’t…

Because dogs and babies love me… (remember, do not trust anybody that dogs and babies do not like)… and so do horses and, it turns out, birds.

Man, that was so much fun.

I could have stayed there all day.

Hey, watch those claws, buddy.

Bird-brains of a feather, flocking together.

Posted in dogs and other animals, My travels, Pictures of me, Stories of my life | Tagged animals, awesome birds, birds, current-events, hawaii, humor, maui, photography, social-media, travel | 16 Comments

It’s all about me… part 4…

Posted on July 8, 2014 by pouringmyartout

I like the fact that my wife’s sister’s husband took pictures of me while I was taking pictures of other things… like that volcano. That right there is me, taking pictures of the crater of a volcano on Maui, just so I could post the picture for you here on my blog. That is me doing nice stuff for you.

Cropping my wife out of these pictures was hard… no, not emotionally… you know I am too self-centered for that… I mean it was hard to cut her out and still leave a good picture of me… see, you can still see some of her hair blowing in on the right of the photo… but if I had cut any more off, I would have had to cut off some of my own face.

I mean, it is too bad you can’t see my wife. She is awesome.

But that’s the way she wants it… so you get to look at a bunch of pictures of our second honeymoon on Maui that make it look like I went there all by myself.

Kirk, my brother-in-law, has an awesome camera. Most of the shots I have been doing for this series are pictures he took. He got a really good view of the inside of the crater of the volcano when the wind lifted the clouds for a moment…

But you know what is missing from those two pictures…

ME!

Oh yeah… that’s much better.

Posted in My travels, Pictures of me, Stories of my life | Tagged current-events, hawaii, humor, maui, photography, social-media, travel, volcano | 8 Comments

It’s all about me… part 3…

Posted on July 7, 2014 by pouringmyartout

Hey now… don’t be lookin’ at these out of order, Mr. Johnny-come-lately-pants!

Yes, I know it is a picture of an incredibly handsome man with huge feet in front of a gorgeous sunset on the island of Maui… I know all this because that handsome devil is me… hence the clever name of these posts… which you have to look at in order…

Okay, I don’t look quite as good when I am not backlit by a tropical sunset, but it could be worse.

That is a picture of me standing next to my lovely wife… who doesn’t want to be in my blog… so I cropped her out. That picture was taken on the top of a volcano.

And so was that one, but I know how much Trent likes it when I wear my shades… oh, yeah. (Trent is my official head minion on this blog, for those of you who are not aware of that rather disturbing fact)…

Whoops… I tried to crop my wife out of this picture too… but I just noticed that I left her hand in the picture… right by my crotch… which will probably get my PG rating changed… hey… don’t judge us… we were on our second honeymoon!

I feel bad for cutting her out of the pictures. But hey, she wants it that way. But just look how sad I am without her in that picture up there…

Here we are having fun at a luau… no… that isn’t her at the table behind me… that is somebody else’s wife, I guess.

There we are in the little town of Lahaina. My wife likes to snuggle so close to me that I had to cut part of myself out of that picture.

And, once more, there we are on the top of the volcano. That was the only time on the whole trip I wore that coat. But I am glad I had it that day.

Posted in My travels, Pictures of me, Stories of my life | Tagged current-events, hawaii, honeymoon, humor, maui, photography, social-media, travel | 8 Comments

It’s all about me… part 2…

Posted on July 7, 2014 by pouringmyartout

I met some nice people on Maui, and made some new friends… like that guy that I met outside the winery we visited. I think he really liked my stories.

I made friends with a nice goat…

And then I made friends with another nice goat. I like that picture. I don’t even know who took it, but you can see that I am taking a picture of the goat while somebody took that picture of me.

That is a very serious picture of me… or a picture of a very serious me… at that fancy ‘Mama’s Fish House’ restaurant. You can tell it is a fancy place to eat, because I am holding a warm washcloth in my hand. They give you a moist little towel to clean yourself up with.

Okay, I have no idea what I am doing there, but I seem to be pointing at something exciting.

I guess whatever it was went away.

There I am getting ready to smoke a cigarette… one of the loneliest things a person can do… good thing I love hanging out with me.

And there I am driving the monster puke-green Mustang… I really miss that car.

Just so you know, I didn’t even drink anything at the winery. I am not a big fan of wine. But I can fake being drunk with the best of them.

Posted in My travels, Pictures of me, Stories of my life | Tagged cars, current-events, drinking, hawaii, honeymoon, humor, maui, photography, social-media, travel, winery | 34 Comments

It’s all about me… part 1

Posted on July 7, 2014 by pouringmyartout

My motto is: I before we, except after me…

Even the crack squirrels in my head can’t get me to stop thinking about myself. I am just that self-centered. We are getting close to the end of the pictures of our second honeymoon on Maui. So I am warning you right now. I am going to do a lot of posts today.

And they are all going to be pictures of me.

I have selfies.

I have pictures my wife took of me.

I have pictures my wife’s sister’s husband took of me.

And since my wife doesn’t want to be in my blog, I am going to resort to something drastic. You may remember that I was trying to cover her up with funny pictures or by coloring over her and making her look like a cartoon character. To save time, I am going to just crop her out of some of these.

I will try to limit the amount of words I type between the pictures to make this easy for you… but that part is sort of up to the crack squirrels in my head.

And now, pictures of me snorkeling on a reef in Maui, taken by my lovely wife…

Oh, yeah…

Check out those huge, wrinkly feet…

That must have been the day that I didn’t wear swim fins because the fins had rubbed holes in the top of my feet. Fortunately, with size 15 feet, fins are not really necessary.

That ain’t a good look for me…

Okay, I think I took that picture. My wife wasn’t riding me around like a sea horse.

Posted in My travels, Pictures of me, Stories of my life | Tagged current-events, hawaii, humor, maui, photography, second honeymoon, skin diving, snorkeling | 32 Comments

The cleaner wrasse fish… part 2…

Posted on July 7, 2014 by pouringmyartout

I know, I already told you about the cleaner wrasse, the cute little fish that cleans algae and other marine growths off of other fish on the reefs around Maui.

But I still have a few more pictures… so…

I didn’t want to waste them.

And as I floated there so serenely, I did see a lot of cool fish.

And it was so much easier than chasing them all around the reef.

And what the heck is that fish with the funny lips???

We may never know, but it sure does look happy. Okay, that is it for random gratuitous fish pictures from our second honeymoon on Maui…

But that isn’t all of the pictures of our trip… just so you know…

Posted in dogs and other animals, My travels, Stories of my life | Tagged diving, fish, fish pictures, hawaii, humor, little fish, maui, nature, photography, reef fish | 4 Comments

Dear new followers… just so you know… this blog isn’t at all what you might think it is…

Posted on July 6, 2014 by pouringmyartout

I know, I have been posting a lot of cute posts lately. Post with photos of my second honeymoon in Maui, and the state fair, and my recent trip to the Bay Area. But that isn’t really what this blog is about. It is about my life. It is a view inside my head… my crack squirrel-infested head…

I like to read the little info tags on the gravatar images of my new followers. Some of you seem to be very nice, highly educated, upstanding citizens. I think one of you even has a doctorate in behavioral psychology. So I do these posts every now and then, just to make sure that you are fully aware that these brief periods of cute, wholesome, normality are going to come to an end sooner or later. And then things are going to get weird.

You might want to poke around a little. My whole sidebar and the top bar are set up to make it easy to find things on this blog. Pick something random and click on it. Or pick a random month and scroll through the post titles. If, after ten minutes, you decide that this place is not your cup of tea, I will totally understand if you want to unfollow me.

I do this just so you don’t open your reader page some day and find a picture of Dick Cheney Photoshopped into some outrageous situation, or read a poem about something that scars you for life.

Although, now that I think about it, it might be nice if the behavioral psychologist sticks around… you might come in handy…

Posted in stuff about blogging, thinking about stuff | Tagged behavioral psychology, blogging, blogs, current-events, humor, social-media, wordpress | 12 Comments

The cleaner wrasse fish… part one…

Posted on July 6, 2014 by pouringmyartout

Well, we are almost done with the pictures of fish I took while skin diving on my second honeymoon in Maui.

But I was floating around out there… you know… like you do…

And I saw all these different types of fish gathering in one place.

I figured there was some sort of food supply, but they didn’t seem to be eating… just waiting…

And that is when I noticed the Hawaiian cleaner wrasse fish… the little blue and yellow ones by the big red arrow… I added that arrow just so you know… it isn’t a Hawaiian red arrow fish…

There are several types of fish in the sea that clean other fish. You should Google it… or watch the nature channel now and then. It is quite fascinating. There are even fish that clean sharks, and the sharks let them do it without biting them. The fish even swim right into the shark’s mouth.

So fish from all over the reef would come and gather and wait their turn patiently and politely, so they could have marine growth nibbled off of their bodies.

It is like a car wash… for fish…

And it is a great way to see lots of fish without having to swim all over the place.

Posted in dogs and other animals, My travels, Stories of my life | Tagged current-events, different types of fish, fish, hawaii, humor, maui, nature, photography | 12 Comments

Oh snap! I just noticed that I now have over 100,000 comments on my blog…

Posted on July 3, 2014 by pouringmyartout

And I did it while I was goofing around with my buddy, Trent, over on that post where we are trying to break the record for the most comments on a WordPpress post, which is almost up to 30,000 comments now. Thanks, Trent. That is why you are my head minion!