A Christmas poem rewrite for Trump voters…


T’was the night before the election, and all through my gut

My last meal was stirring, and shooting straight out of my butt

The pollsters had been certain Hillary would win it with ease

Who would actually vote for that pussy-grabbing sleaze?

Absolutely no one was laying all snug in their bed

As we watched on the map, states turn blue or turn red

And as the map turned redder than a really bad crime scene

We began to ask ourselves, just what would this mean?

Well, let me tell you what it means, you racists and thugs

You Trump-supporting Nazis and human-shaped slugs

It means that you won, and for now, you are happy

And it means that for all of us, life’s about to get crappy

It means the future of our planet rests with climate change deniers

It means flooding and storms, it means famine and fires

It means unregulated smokestacks vomiting filth in the air

It means no choices for women, and no fucking healthcare

It means a supreme court that will put corporations before people

It means freedom of religion… as long as there is a cross on the steeple

It means that people of color will be living in fear

It means our election was decided by a guy named Vladimir

It means Donald will drain the swamp, and replace what we had

With ass-hats who will end up being ten times as bad

So enjoy it while you can, if you voted for Trump

Because you’ll be living right beside us… in a vast, toxic dump

When you let Nazis help extinguish lady liberty’s lamp

Don’t be surprised if you end up locked up in a camp

About pouringmyartout

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10 Responses to A Christmas poem rewrite for Trump voters…

  1. Ahmed Borman says:

    The dems are in panic now, speaking in rhymes;
    The Russians! The recount! The electoral crimes!
    Their candidate SUCKED but they’ll never admit it;
    Even Art shuns her name (he just doesn’t get it).

    Your candidate CLINTON was a pre-destined loser;
    If dems are so smart, then why did they choose her?
    The votes have been counted and now there’s denial;
    Had Hillary won though, she’d soon be on trial.

    The libs will be back, it’s for certain they will;
    Their next pick for prez will be Donna Brazile!
    Or maybe run Huma! Or Wasserman-Schultz!
    And Weiner for V.P. … I still feel a pulse.

    But TRUMP got the votes and it couldn’t be clearer;
    For why you dems lost, just look in the mirror.

    • An interesting response from a guy named Ahmed… you are probably on a list of some kind already, and I have a feeling Trump will be indicted for something before long… but that was a pretty dang good poem!

  2. Al says:

    That’s spot on. The world is screwed now. The hope that the college of electors would see sense has been dashed, and now a man with no political knowledge and has no idea how to run a business is going to be running a country and will be screwing the world over.

  3. Lucy Brazier says:

    Those opening two lines alone deserve the Nobel. Great work, Art.

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