… even though it is about Conan the barbarian and Dick Cheney and Doctor Seuss and Fred Flintstone and bad poetry and near death experiences and me…
I need your help… sigh, yes, I see you raising your hand, Doctor Roseblatz… yes, I know you are a respected mental health professional… I admire your zeal, but that isn’t the kind of help I need… right now…
I need help making the best possible use of the help that someone else already gave me.
My good friend Zoe… okay, she has a blog called: http://behindthemaskofabuse.com/ … which is both the darkest and the most uplifting blog ever, because she deals with abuse and the horrible things people do to other people, by sharing the things that happened to her and she really helps people who have been abused and molested and I love her and I admire her so much, but I can hardly read her blog because I want to cry or kill someone… or both at the same time if I could find the right people… but anyway…
She also has another blog called: We Poets Show It… which I can’t seem to find right now to do a link to… which brings me nicely to my next point…
I am a computer moron. I can’t do anything. Because I am all art-side-of-the-brain, and computers are all logic. But Zoe rocks, and she helps me with stuff. Like putting my art and poems on the We Poets website, which is a place where you can get your art or words viewed by tons of people… And before Christmas she helped me make a few changes on my blog. I bet you didn’t even notice, did you?
Look at my sidebar! There is a little box that shows a slide show of funny pictures of me. That wasn’t there before. And she helped me set up the new book page, so that if you click on any of my books, you can GO AND BUY THEM more easily… hint… hint…
But she also set up a Tag Cloud! No, I have no idea what that is, but if you scroll down and look on the sidebar near the bottom right, it is there. And inside it, it says something about categories. I think this means that instead of me having to tell you to use the search magnifying glass thing, I can go back and tag things, or somehow label them into categories to make it easier to find. It means I would… once again… be doing all the hard work for you!
So here is my serious question to you:
What do you want me to put in there???
This is where it gets tricky. My blog covers a lot of ground. If you are new, and haven’t played the ‘type weird words and sentences into the search thing’ game, or scrolled down a very long way, you have no idea what it is I do here.
So I want to make it easy for you. But I need to know what you want to be able to find. As part of my service to you, I have opened up my blog twice… or opened two of my blog… however that works, and I am, as I type here, scrolling back through my other blog… well, it is the same one as this one, but you know what I mean… because even I can’t remember everything I have done here, and supposedly, I am the one who did it!
I am now going to make a list… remember, this is only about things that I did a series of posts about, enough to have them qualify as a category… to see the single crazy posts, you still have to scroll or search. This list is going to be things that you can ask me to put in the tag cloud category thing so you can go back and look at them… with me so far?
Okay, here we go:
——————————
Really mean Photoshop pictures of Dick Cheney… (I hate that guy)
Awesome and funny pictures of Conan the barbarian… (I love that guy)
Really weird pictures of famous cartoon characters…
Original poems…
Pictures of me…
Funny pictures of me…
Weird pictures of me… (Okay, that was a trick, you are going to see lots of pictures of me anyway, but if you want them all in one place, now is your chance to say so)
My original art… (If you pick this, I will love you forever)
Pictures of Willie… (Oh, get your head out of the gutter, he is a kid, he lives in the Bay Area, and he shows up here a lot, because I love kids, and there are some really funny ones where I did some Photoshop magic)
Pictures of sunsets, or clouds, or sunsets with clouds…
Pictures of all the cool places we have been since I started this blog…
Funny Photoshop pictures of famous people, such as Abraham Lincoln, Batman, Fred Flintstone, Charlie Brown, the Hulk, Einstein, Hitler, the Beatles, Putin, storm troopers, dead heads, Lady Gaga, Genghis Khan, Popeye, Wonder Woman, Yoda, Sam I Am, or just about anybody else you could name…
Short stories…
Short stories where I almost die…
Funny pictures of the crack squirrels who live in my head and actually do all the ideas for this blog…
Pictures of dogs I have met, and my dog, of course…
Funny pictures of animals that I may sort of have messed with… a little…
Pictures of the San Francisco Bay Area, yay!…
Pictures of my naughty bits… (Not really, just making sure you hadn’t nodded off)
Bloggers that you might know that I either wrote funny stuff about or messed with in Photoshop…
Funny pictures where I stuck my mustache or sunglasses on lots of people…
——————
Okay, that is enough ideas. If you want more, scroll or search. My fingers hurt.
Pouring My Art Out 
Yes! That’s what I want.
alrightythen
Definitely original artwork
Yay.
I think you can do a top bar (where you have links to your songs and alien pictures) with the drop down menus, and make categories up there with subcategories in the drop downs. You have so much stuff that if you just put all those categories on the sidebar, it might look too cluttered. Oh, by the way, I think you can also make a sidebar with two columns instead of one.
I am worried about looking cluttered… I am getting some good tech support from nice people, thanks.
Original poems, art, and stories… would love to read them.
The whole blog is littered with them, but I will see what I can do.
Pictures of Willie. Willie, oh Willie.
That’s from the Who, again. You should collect all your photo posts in a menu, and use some pictures to link to those posts. Then you should link to a link that enters the Choose Your Own Blog Adventure somewhere in the middle of my series, near where you are a possible ending. Then you should make a link picture where each pixel links to a different follower.
Sorry. I don’t know how to do that last one.
I don’t know how to do any of them.
Then frim fram the jeeble jobble
Where Bill Cosby meets Lewis Carroll???
Jabberllo pudding pocky
Now you are talking! Sort of…
My wish list:
-more Willie photos. That kid is cute
-photos of the offspring of Conan and Dick Cheney. The mind boggles
-photos of boggles
-a serious exploration of penis art
-short stories between 600 and 1000 words. I think you could rock these. Bonus points for near-death experiences
-anything related to Napoleon Dynamite. Especially delicious bass
-a loving tribute to the Montreal Expos. Be mushy and sentimental. Invite Rusty Staub
-interviews. You should do interviews. You should interview many people in your own unique way. Start with a celebrity, such as Weebles. She is always interesting. And scary. Occasionally pick an unknown blogger and interview them. Explore your star power
I like all of it but the penis part.
That’s what she said.
Now I have to go to bed with that on my mind… sigh…
Me…start interviewing in your own unique way with me!!
This might be a fun idea… I have to think about it… maybe do a post…
I think it would be hilarious!!
It might be, plus I could give people a little exposure, and have some fun.
I like people being exposed…oh wait…never mind. Been single too long…
I knew you were going to jump on that word…
Jump on it??? Sounds fun…I’m in!!!
Seriously, how long could you survive exposure in winter up there?
If you’re doing it right…?
Well, let’s assume, for the sake of argument, that you are, yes…
Less than an hour…we don’t call it frost bite, it’s an ice tan…
Most people on the beach don’t lose a toe…
You know you’re from the north when you can still have ok sex while still almost fully dressed in. snowmobile gear!!
That sounds… uh… I got nothin’…
Maybe I’ll write an erotic story…explain it in detail!!
That would be a bad porno movie… like watching marshmallows making love.
It takes tallent…and you learn quickly that black snow pants need to be checked thoroughly for spots…
We seem to have gotten a little off topic for this post…
Ok…um, original artwork
That is getting some votes… thanks.
In less than 30 seconds exposed skin can be frozen…
wow
Supposed to drop to 70 below with the windchill on Monday!!
I can’t even imagine that, and I have a pretty good imagination.
Um, a penis?
maybe
I was going to say Willie and Photo Shop. Those are my favorites of yours. And when those two overlap it is almost more than I can stand. Almost.
Good to know… and thanks.
I’ve got mine set up with Link Pages.for Limerick and Friday Foolishness. Every post i tag with one of those is automatically added to the page. That way, it’s not individual posts, but the entire category, in reverse order (newest to oldest), but that might be reversible.
Lt me know if you want me to send you a how-to email to set that up. Check out my blog and see if that’s what you want.
Thanks… you know how this stuff scares me…
Give me a little while. I’ll send you a word doc with pictures and everything!
You guys are too good to me… sigh…
On it’s way…
Let me know if you have any problems.
Sorry… had to go out… I will check it tomorrow… thanks so much.
Some of your old artwork(I love artwork, although if I were to ever try to do it, it’d be a disaster!) , the pictures of sunsets(they always make me feel calmer about things) and pictures of all the cool places you’ve always been. Why? Because I probably haven’t been there and different places and cultures interest me.
Awesome. I wonder how many I can put in there?
Now that I don’t know. The only thing I can helpfully suggest is Google..and sometimes even that is not all helpful.
I have my tech support peeps!
Well then it looks like you’re all set. Now I’m off to google to research more on vlogging. I did my very first one and I want to improve. Off to google I go!
Vlogging???
Yes, Vlogging. It’s when you post up a video and talk about a topic instead of writing about a topic. It was a first and my daughter was the reason I even attempted it. ‘Mommy you should talk to them…’ and that’s how my first VLOG was born
I did some videos in Utube for my original songs in that button the top bar. Not really videos. And I do these funny little moving pictures where you take still photos and cut them up and move them in Photoshop, then put them together in a thing called something I can’t remember…
I think I know what you’re talking about. It’s like the computer version of Flip Motion.
I guess so… oh, it’s called lunapic…
I should really learn how to take videos on the Ipad and get them in here… I could do all kinds of fun stuff with that.
You should be able to… if you have a forward facing camera on your ipad… you can get a webcam app and record yourself. Then use your USB drive to upload them to your computer and then onto wordpress
I don’t know if straight video goes on WordPress… for the music videos I had to convert them to something first.