Yes… you herd me… (ha, see what I did there?)… Nazi cows are a real thing. Don’t you watch the Daily Show with Jon Stewart? Were else can you get your news and still laugh?
It turns out that back during the Nazi era in Germany, Nazi scientists were hard at work trying to make the perfect Nazi bovines. Goering, who fancied himself a hunter, dreamed of the good old days… way back when giant and slightly insane cattle called aurochs used to roam Europe. The last known member of this species died in Poland… back in 1627.
Goering thought it would be nice to have huge, horned psychopathic killer cows running around in the forests of Germany so the Germans, after the war, could hunt them… presumably with small pocket knives and wearing loincloths… you know… to show how manly the Germans can be. Also because the Germans like to put meat in everything… including applesauce.
Anyway, a farmer in England somehow got ahold of some of these genetically altered cows… and these might have been a watered-down version of what the Nazis were hoping for… and he ended up having to kill them all… because every time he or anyone else went into the field with these Nazi cows, the cows tried to kill them.
So why is a guy who has a head full of crack squirrels worried about Nazi cows? I’m not… the idea strikes me as hilarious… but I do find myself thankful that the Nazi scientists didn’t get hold of some Saber-toothed cat DNA.
And maybe we should just stop genetically modifying our food and animals until we really think this through…
Pouring My Art Out 
Great traditions die hard. smirk.
so do Nazi cows
AH HA! Hahahaha
well you say that until one shows up at your house
Look I am dealing with the squirrels every day. I have my hands full…the little darlins’. Don’t believe that I have time for reconstituted aurochs.
and if they ever start doing crack
They are on paper and well…I am in control. Sorta’ in control. They are after all a creative device, right?
They are until they escape…
guffaw!
yup
Unholy Cow!
good one
Nazi cows weren’t a joke? The “playing-to-be-gods” Nazis wanted for real to create them? Agg…
see, so it is and isn’t a joke… sort of… maybe…
That was one of the funniest bits I’ve seen on the Daily show in years. Good thing the nazis didn’t know about crack squirrels, is ‘t it?
They were a highly classified secret project…
Nice picture. Did you draw it yourself?
clip art
Did you search for it under Nazis or Bovines?
just cows… I did the swastikas myself
Swastikas? I did not-see them.
seriously? are you a holocaust denier? HA!!!
I saw that on The Daily Show>/i>. Incredible. One of these days, some mad scientists somewhere are going to create something that can’t be eradicated, not because they should, but because they can. You know, like a weapons-grade biological virus that could wipe out all of humanity. Who knows? Maybe they already have and it’s on ice until just the right time.
Oops. I f*cked up my HTML. Sorry about that. But, hey, it’s the content that counts, right?
I hope so
Lots of people have tons of that stuff… just a question of one getting out.
I herd you all right… crikes, true story? Those Nazis were a real bunch of wankers, eh? And now, I’m going to retire to add some meat to applesauce, because that sounds scary good… don’t worry, I will be drinking wine too. Oh yes I will.
it should be beer…
Wine is stronger.
beer is more Germanic
I can’t argue with you there… I also have no idea what you’re getting at, largely because I’ve consumed a lot of wine.
well of course you have
Yup.
ha