If just one person from your country clicks on anything on my blog, I will do all I can to increase my carbon footprint and speed up global warming so your glaciers will retreat and you will have weather like San Diego does now. Think about it… palm trees and beaches you can actually use for swimming. The name of your country will no longer be famous for its ironic overtones.
And don’t think this is a good deal for me. San Diego is already hot. By the time you are planting palm trees, I will be living in a placed that makes Death Valley look like Maui.
But I do need to get some color on Greenland in my WordPress stat page map.
So I am willing to make the sacrifice.
Hey, I can always move to Greenland, right?
Pouring My Art Out 
Or you could beg and beg and beg me to give you the blog address of my friendly Greenlandic follower who ever so kindly mentioned me in his blog, which brought me even more Greenlandic readers.
Greenland would make a fun vacation, BTW. The people are very friendly.
I am not much on begging, but I am not above sneaking around and finding this guy and then stalking him…
Hey, i’m all for helping out… Hell we got San D’ego in Vancouver couldn’t take that long.
That’s the spirit.
Say when do we get started…
right now
i can’t remember what are we starting?
I don’t remember either
i say let the show begin…
that works
What is it that we’re doing i had forgotten?
Something about neffies, ice land what?
I need my Greenland hit for my stats!
Green land, i shall look into it!
i shall look into it!
Yes, now i will get right on that!
awesome
Let the Greenland games begin…
oh yeah
Have you gotten any hits yet?
no
i would have to say we’ll have to work harder!
we could try that
Damn we must try harder!
true
Tomorrow is another day…
hopefully
Faith my son…… lol
ok
ifinn i know you would give in that easy, you want to buy a bridge?
We went over this already.
i know just thought you were holding out?
I am holding in.
yaa you play those cards close, i love cheating!
I am an open book…
May i ask, what page you are on?
It is always the first page.
So how many first pages to we have?
Whatever 54 times 365 is.
Then why do they call it page one?
they don’t… I called it that
you do now/
ok
Ummmm, Art? You don’t seem to have a map stat page …
The map on the stat page that has the countries change color as you get hits from there… you might not be able to see it.
I’ll have to look. I used to have the flags on a widget but it got very crowded. The sidebar that is.
Let me know how that works.
It didn’t. Buti’m on my iPad trying to keep the puppy from piercing my Achilles’ tendon. So I’m not giving it my all.
ha
Now that Trent has eaten your crack squirrels, what do you have to offer Greenland? – after all they’ll have San Diego weather sooner or later anyway, whether you help or not.
All I can do is speed the process.
Isn’t there a minion who can figure out how to connect through a Greenland IP address?
who knows
That’s faragin brilliant and might save me from being burned to crisp…
And away I go! If anyone can do it, I can! (That actually makes it sound *WAY* less special, doesn’t it?)
wait… is that cheating?
Yes
ok
That still sounds special, because I don’t think I know how to do it. Were you able to visit Art from Greenland? It was already pretty hot last week, and I worry it would get even warmer.
I will turn the death ray on them if they do not accede to my demands! Wait… do we have a death ray? Which minion is in charge of research and development again?
I don’t know, I’m in the department of backstabbing and political analysis.
We need a secretary minion to write all this stuff down.
That would be me sir – I’m in charge of the death ray. We found that this would take a lot of work and money and we wanted you to have the very best at the best price as quick as possible, so we investigated alternate methods. We’ve come up with a natural based product that will surely let you rule the world (or Greenland) and do it in an environmentally acceptable way with all natural products. We have prepared this top secret video for your perusal. Please do not view this unless the room is cleared of all those who do not need to know:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OIXACZeKYVY&feature=player_embedded
Look out Greenland, here we come! (and with all natural products in inviting colors)
You did say you wanted to add color to Greenland in order to take it over, didn’t you?
Well, I could just add color to Greenland on the stats map by copying it into Photoshop… or just use a marker right on my computer monitor.
Are you suggesting I conquer the world with blueberry farts? The other evil super villains will laugh at me.
You are seriously underestimating the power of the blueberry fart. Let them laugh, the one who wields this technology will surely end up as the ruler of the universe – as you are my Great Lord. Pehaps you could do this on your computer, but what if they attacked the power plants first and there was no power – what then? This tech is fully self-contained – you can color any country any color you like any time day or night, from your own bed or on the run on a horse.Even in the dark, you can identify the readiness and color by the newest fart tehnology;
Use and enjoy your highness!
you do make a good point