Gettin’ all Christmassy… part 6…

Here is a reblog of a post I did, based on a comment I made on another blog post… and, once again, I apologize if it isn’t actually designed to get you all into the Christmas spirit, but let’s face it, some people lean more towards the Grinch side, and maybe that bears some thinking about… I know… I am making you think again… I swear I will do more posts later that are mostly just funny pictures…

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I guess one thing that always bothers me about the new, more militant religious conservative Christians, is their complete failure to grasp the message that the person they claim to follow was really trying to teach his followers. Not once, as far as I can remember, did Jesus ever stop and ask somebody what religion they followed before he offered to help them. And considering the fact that he started off with only 12 guys who could even be considered his followers, that pretty much means that everybody he helped was a non-Christian. I mean, not to put too fine a point on it, but the way he got new followers was to show them compassion and love regardless of what they believed. Maybe that was the whole idea of his teachings. To show so much compassion and love to other people that they became intrigued by him and ended up wanting to be more like him. And then there is the whole ‘turn the other cheek’ message which seems to get overlooked in the rush to find more judgmental biblical quotes to use to tell everybody else how evil they are.
And when you get right down to it, the only people Jesus ever got so mad at that he threw a hissy fit and ended up flipping over tables was a bunch of rich money lenders… or what we today would call bankers… something else to think about… if you are into that whole ‘thinking’ thing.

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Where the heck is everybody?

…ooo000ooo…

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Shenanigans…yeah, I got those… right here, baby!

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And you don’t even have to help with the muckraking.

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The return of Christmas ninja…

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Because, seriously… Christmas ninja should be a thing…

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Yeah… all that stuff came out of my crack squirrel-infested head…

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You may remember that part in the middle with the white background. It was for a T-shirt I designed to advertise my children’s books and my action/humor science fiction novel series… (all still available over there in the sidebar, if you click the pictures of the books, you can actually order them)… On the back of the shirt, there are pictures of the book covers. I wear that shirt when I go places, and I sometimes sell a book or two, or attract a new victim… uh… I mean ‘follower’… to my blog.

But the thing is… hey, we haven’t had a ‘thing’ around here for a while… that the characters from my newest books for kids… (The Lonely Little Wizard, also available over there to the right)… were feeling left out. They say they want to be put on a shirt so they can walk around outside and see some stuff and breathe fresh air now and then.

So, I guess I should start working on that… you do not want to make wizards angry.

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My new babysitting gig…part 4… Drum solo!!!

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You can’t go wrong with the classics… and a metal pot and a big wooden spoon is always going to be a hit… ha… see what I did there?

a 11 Day two of my babysitting adventure with Olivia, the daughter of some friends of ours… went well.

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Because, once again, babies, dogs and horses love me, Admit it, that is a pretty good selfie.

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And I am doing this for three more days next week… so…

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I get to spend more time with my little buddy. And I know we are having fun, because, by the time her mom and dad get home, I am freekin’ exhausted… and so is she…

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The Seven Kingdoms… Chapter 7…

***(Spoiler alert- if you don’t want to get these little snippets into the writing process for this novel as I create it here, right in front of your very eyes, please ignore this post, and read the whole thing without these interruptions… (what I have so far)… under the button in the top bar, called: The Seven Kingdoms)***

Also, don’t forget to submit your name for a chance to be written into the book as a character… (see that post I did about it by scrolling down on the main blog page)

Okay, I am really starting to like Nudge… sorry, Prince Nujeem Skull, the young enemy prince that my brave princess Hildy… sorry, princess Hildread Starrgarrd Halfmoon… captures in this chapter. He was a surprise character that just sort of popped into my head when I began toying with the idea of having one of the many Skull Princes actually be a nice guy. Now that he is with my band of awesome princesses… and the first bit of what will soon be an awesome army of resistance against the evil Skull kingdom… he can give us insights into the way that dark kingdom works…

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The Seven Kingdoms

 

Chapter Seven

 

As they drew near the dirt road, Hildy motioned for the group to stop so she and the captain could go forward to scout. They heard voices on the road before they could see the road itself. When she parted the leaves on a thick shrub she was surprised by the sight of a funerary procession. Six Skull soldiers carried on their shoulders a bier made of staves. On it lay a body covered in a black cloak with a white border. She had no doubt whose body it was.

Trailing behind the men bearing the dead prince were two dozen or so Skull soldiers, all of whom appeared to have received some type of injury during the battle. Some where limping along using their staves as crutches while others had arms in slings or bandage-wrapped heads. Walking with the battered soldiers, still wearing his overly-decorated armor, she spotted the young Skull prince whose life she had spared.

This was too good an opportunity to pass up. She motioned the captain to follow her, and they quickly and quietly rejoined their group. She told them her plan in hushed tones, then led them at an angle back towards the road so that they would be ahead of the Skull procession.

The ambush was almost too easy. The Skull soldiers had no time to even consider putting blades on their staves before they were completely surrounded by a greater number of enemy soldiers- soldiers that looked as if they would be all too happy to meet out a little revenge for their recent defeat. Hildy went to stand before the young Skull prince. She was quite surprised by his reaction. He gave her a wide smile and looked for all the world as if he was quite happy to see her.

“It’s you!” the prince said excitedly. “You were magnificent in the battle. I’ve never seen anything like it, but of course, it was my very first battle ever. Thank you for not knocking out my teeth, or, you know, killing me, or anything.”

Hildy couldn’t keep from smiling back at him. His enthusiasm was infectious. “Who are you?”

“I am Nujeem, but everybody calls me Nudge,” he answered, still beaming at her.

“How old are you?” she couldn’t help asking.

“I am twelve, but only for a few more weeks.”

Hildy had been studying him. He was small and thin, and his skin was actually tan, especially when compared to his brother. His long hair was also dark brown rather than black. She asked him about that.

“Oh, my father, the king, likes to have… uh… dalliances with many women. He tends to prefer his own cousins for marriage, but now and then, another lady catches his eye. That’s why he has so many children, you know. There are so many of us spread about the kingdom that I don’t think I have even met all of them yet.” He seemed ready to go on speaking for some time, but she cut him off to make sure her plans were being carried out.

Her men had stripped the armor and uniforms from the Skull troops, and they had enjoyed doing it. The prisoners, now wearing just their underclothes, were all tied to trees not too far from the road, where eventually someone would hear their cries. The corpse of prince Nardis lay beside them on his bier, still covered in his cloak.

Twenty nine of her men, slightly more than half, were now uniformed as Skull soldiers, complete with the iron spear blades at their belts. For the first time, prince Nujeem looked a little nervous. “So, what happens now?” he wanted to know.

“You are going to help us steal one of your father’s ships,” Hildy explained.

“Ooh, that sound like fun.” The prince was back to his usual enthusiastic self.

“You don’t seem too upset by the fact that I killed your brother,” Hildy pointed out.

“He wasn’t very nice to me,” the prince confided.

The sun was lowering itself to the sea as they descended the hills, staying under the cover of the trees. By the time they reached the outskirts of Evergreentown, the sun was just dipping below the horizon. “Remember,” Hildy announced to those gathered around her, “we are just a column of Skull troops escorting some prisoners to one of the ships. If anybody stops us, our new friend here,” she gestured at Nudge, “will talk us through. We aren’t going to have to worry about you betraying us, are we?” she finished to the young prince.

Nudge eyed captain Tar, in his Skull uniform, who stood by his side. The captain placed a hand on the sharp iron blade at his belt. “No, don’t worry about me. This is the first time I ever got to go anywhere interesting. I want to see more of the world.”

With that they formed into a column with those dressed as Skulls appearing to be guarding those that weren’t. The march through town was accomplished with no trouble. All the Skull soldiers and sailors that they saw looked to be drunk. The taverns were doing a booming business, and many of the enemy were just wandering the streets in small groups, holding jugs of wine or beer. There was a lot of off-key singing.

“At least they put out the fires before the party started,” Hildy heard captain Tar mutter.

The first sober Skull troops they encountered were a surly pair at the head of the closest pier, where they hoped to find a ship. Two Skull ships were tied at the dock. The two Skull guards didn’t say a word to them as they trooped by. They seemed to be too busy sulking over having a job to do while their fellows were all busy carousing.

They continued on to the end of the dock. Hildy randomly picked the ship on the left. Discipline was a little tighter on the ship. A sailor at the bottom of the boarding ramp demanded they state their business before proceeding.

Prince Nudge stepped forward to confront the man. “Move aside, or I will have you chopped up for bait,” he said in a bored voice. He began walking up the ramp without waiting for a reply, while the horrified sailor sputtered an apology for not recognizing him sooner in the dim light. Word of the prince’s arrival moved faster than the prince himself. By the time he reached the top of the ramp, the captain of the ship was there to welcome him aboard.

“How may I be of service?” the captain asked.

“Get this scow ready to sail. See that we are moving before I get settled into your cabin, or I will find someone who can, and make them captain.” Once again, the prince didn’t wait for an answer but brushed past the man as though he had already forgotten that he even existed. “Bring the prisoners,” the prince commanded captain Tar, still without slowing down.

Captain Tar pretended to herd the tree princesses towards the ship’s superstructure. As she followed, Hildy spotted Tull, dressed in his captured Skull uniform, roughly shoving his brother into the group of pretend prisoners. He was enjoying his role all too much.

The ship’s captain was bellowing orders and crewmen were swarming about the deck or scrambling aloft into the rigging to set the sails. Once the small group of royalty and captain Tar were in the cabin, Hildy spared Nudge a real smile. “Don’t you think you might have been overdoing it just a bit?”

Nudge seemed confused by the question. “Are you joking? I was far more polite than most of my family would have been. If I was any nicer, the captain would have suspected something was wrong. That’s one of the things I hate about my kingdom. I can never be nice to anybody. Nobody can. It’s just all so stupid.”

There was a knock at the door. It was the ship’s captain, telling Nudge that the ship was now under way, and asking where he should set a course to. Nudge had been told what to do. “Order the crew to assemble on deck. I have an announcement to make to you all.” The captain left to carry out these orders. The rest of them followed him out on deck and waited for the crew to gather. None of the sailors or their captain noticed the way the newly-arrived soldiers and their prisoners were spread out around them all along the ship’s rail.

Hildy looked back at the dock disappearing behind them in the darkness. It wasn’t all that far away. She gave Nudge a nod.

“I have wonderful news,” Nudge announced grandly. “You are all going to go for a lovely evening swim.”

The captain and crew began exchanging uncomfortable glances.

“The longer you wait, the further you will have to swim,” said Nudge reasonably.

Still none of the crew moved. Around them, the newly-created Skull soldiers pulled the blades from their sheaths and mounted them on their staves. Soon, a circle of iron points surrounded the sailors. The rest of the prisoners also armed themselves with any handy weapons and joined the circle. Only one small opening was left, to give the crew a path to the ship’s rail.

“I won’t give you another chance!” screamed Nudge, sounding altogether terrifying.

Sailors began to dart towards the railing and leap into the water. The captain led the charge. Two men remained rooted in place in the center of the circle. Hildy wondered if perhaps they didn’t know how to swim, but then she realized there was something familiar about one of the men, even in the dim glow of the ship’s lanterns and pale moonlight.

“Princess,” the man began, and hearing his voice was all it took to bring recognition. Hildy ran over and gave the man a hug while captain Tar looked on in bewilderment.

Hildy turned back to captain Tar. “Captain, allow me to introduce you to captain Nire Reef. Despite the fact that he is wearing the black border of the Skulls on his tunic, he is, in fact, my father’s most trusted trade ship captain, and the only one he trusts to carry his family to any and all of the seven kingdoms.” She suddenly realized two things. They needed to keep the ship moving, but on top of that, she now had two captains and no idea who to put in charge of the ship.

Captain Tar immediately saw the problem. “My Lady, I told you that I am an experienced sailor, and I am. I was raised on my father’s single-masted fishing boat. But I am a captain of soldiers now, and as such, have lived in the castle these last few years  training men to fight. I could certainly sail this three-masted vessel. but I would much rather have a real sailing captain at the helm.

That was all the prompting captain Reef needed. “All of you who know a rigging line from a wine bottle, get aloft and get those sails trimmed. Steer the ship, Leed.” This last was directed at the young man who had remained standing beside him. “The rest of you, make yourselves handy or stay out of the way.”

Hildy watched the old sailor smiling happily. It was so good to see a familiar face from home. The captain was still trim and fit, and his neatly trimmed beard and stubble of hair was no grayer than when she had last seen a handful of months before.

“That is my nephew, Leed,” he told her proudly, watching the young man angle the ship to best catch the wind. “Where away, my Lady? What port do we make for?”

“We’re going to Flame, unless we can think of anyplace better to go,” she replied. “But how did you end up on a Skull ship? And what of your ship, the Wavebounder? Did they take her from you?”

“In a manner of speaking, my Lady,” he said with a laugh. “They did indeed confiscate her, and took crewmen from their other ships to man her, but they were shorthanded, and asked if any of us wanted to sign on as crewmen. I volunteered to stay aboard, figuring it would be my best chance to steal her back.”

“I don’t understand,” said Hildy in some confusion.

“If you look around a little more closely, and ignore the fresh coat of black paint and white trim, you will see your old friend right beneath your very feet.” Captain Reef let out a bellow of a laugh. “I never thought stealing her back would be so easy! And trust me, princess, no Skull ship is ever going to catch the Wavebounder.”

Hildy smiled back at her old friend. “That does explain the strange feeling I’ve been having that I have been here before.”

“Indeed it does, princess,” the captain agreed. “Now, perhaps you can tell me how you got here, why you are wearing an Evergreen uniform and armor, who all these people are, and what in the… bilge water is going on, exactly?”

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My new babysitting gig… part 3…

Well, day two of my adventure taking care of little miss Olivia, the one-year-old daughter of some friends of ours, went off without a hitch… a 1

Because, once again, babies… and dogs and horses… love me.

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I just noticed I was wearing a T-shirt my own kids gave me… more evidence of my lovableness. Wait, spell checker… why is lovableness not a real word?

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I am having so much fun with this little girl.

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I know, she looks very serious in a lot of pictures. That is because she doesn’t have one of those mouths that always looks like it is smiling. And she doesn’t like it when I get the camera out, because it means that I stop playing with her for a few seconds.

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But trust me… there is a lot of laughing and giggling going on.

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I think she loves me.

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And I know dang well I love her!

 

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You still have a chance to be written into my new novel…

I need more names for characters. Okay, that isn’t quite right, I never have problems coming up with names, I did it for four science fiction books, and alien names are tricky!

But I do like writing my blog buddies in…it makes you consider buying my books when they come out. I put like 8 of you in the murder mystery set in World War Two London… available over there… in the side bar… by clicking the picture of the book with the cemetery and British flag on the cover called: Double Service.

Read a few chapters of my new novel… which I am posting here as I write it… by clicking the button called: The Seven Kingdoms… up there… in the top bar… to get an idea of the kinds of names I need.

Then, submit a name you want me to use. I can change it a little if it is a real name… like, I won’t use your first and last name. Or maybe we can work the name of your blog in somehow. Who knows? I already have two new names thanks to you all. Two of the three triplets, princesses named TamTam and Miri.

You might just get a kick out of this.

Get back to me.

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My new babysitting gig… part 2…

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Okay, that might be the best picture I ever took… Olivia is all like: Dude… really… another picture… seriously?

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And that one is a close second.

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In that one, I was trying to do a: Awwww… how cute is she, face… but I just look like a grouchy old man. Remind me not to do the: Get off my lawn! face again.

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That’s more like it.

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Okay, well, I am doing it again tomorrow… and three times next week… and then her mom is quitting her job to stay home with her, so I will just be back to being that sort-of-cool dude who comes to visit as often as I can… sigh. Oh, look… there is that face again… also, please remind me not to look down in pictures anymore… it wrinkles up my neck… more…

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