I have said it before, and I will say it again… Photoshop is way better than real life.
If it wasn’t for Photoshop, I would have all these crazy ideas and images stuck in my head and you would all be stuck reading thousands of words while I tried desperately to let these crazy things out of my skull. But a picture… especially a picture that I can manipulate and change like a wizard casting dark spells… now that is something magical indeed.
You may remember that we took my wife to Disneyland a few weeks ago for her birthday. Every time I go to Disneyland, after we go on the Pirates of the Caribbean ride, I always put on one of the Captain Jack Sparrow hats in the gift store. I want one of those hats. I would actually wear it around all the time. But there is somethings about the scarf that makes the hat ride too high on my giant pointed head, so I always end up not getting one. Our daughter Jessica posted this picture of me on Facebook…
Now that is a nice picture of me in a funny hat. In fact, it makes me want to buy that hat the next time I go to Disneyland. But it isn’t as cool as this…
Because that is me… in a funny hat… but that is Captain Jack Sparrow’s actual hat… and coat… and hands… and beard. And having the power to alter reality, even if it is just tiny dots of light, is just awesome.
I leave you with one final picture that Jess posted on Facebook…
That is what I look like when I am having a good time and I am excited. As my wife never gets tired of pointing out, I do that weird thing with my tongue where I make it all thin. I don’t know why I do that. It makes me look like some kind of chameleon lizard about to shoot my tongue out at some insect so I can suck it back into my face and eat it. But I can fix that… in Photoshop…









I actually noticed the weird tongue thing right away. I think it looks bird-like. You know, like those parrots that have a little stubby tongue for moving the nuts around in their beak. But you know, I have heard that birds and lizards are pretty closely related. So you are like a bird-lizard tongue guy.
Yeah… well… I have been called worse… maybe not with so much style though…
My wife just approved your comment.
Sweet!
She got quite a laugh at your description of my deformity…
you should definitely buy that hat….and i assume they have a clip on beard too?
I will grow my own. And dye it.
yeah….shame about that
sigh…
Did you know being able to curl your tongue is genetically determined? I can roll my tongue into a clam shell shape! I learned this from my daughter, just so you know.
I can do it too… but that isn’t the only thing that makes me a genetic freak of nature…
Great photos! You missed your calling!
No… I found it… Ha!
You could hold classes on photoshop. Not a bad idea – I’ll just need 10% of your earnings for suggesting it
I could if I could figure out how to get people to come to my house.
Put a red light in the window
Do I have to sit in my window in my boxer shorts like an Amsterdam hooker???
Walk around a bit too, the ones in Amsterdam have to move a bit to attract the punters with such fierce competition.
The punters?!?!? I like that.
Never heard that term?
Another name for customer but you only use it for things like pub-goers aswell. You wouldn’t call a diner at a fine restuarant a punter. But someone who picks up a hooker, then yes
I am adding it to my vocabulary and using it wrong all the time.
Rules are for breaking, I wouldn’t expect you to tow the line. Punter incorrectly away!
Punter away… I suppose I can’t take that to literally?
Punt her away
Careful now… steady on, old chap!
It’s romantic especially today of all days
I suppose it depends on how I decided to take that statement.
You can also take a punt on something
Bear with me….I know that sounds like you are relieving yourself!
Taking a punt is taking a chance, a gamble on something.
I like the rude connotations that it’s creating though, much funnier
We use the word punt in American football for a short kick… but the word itself is almost a dirty sounding word.
I’m gonna try and use it more too, I like it, especially works in sentences where it doesn’t fit. I’ll test it later and see if my friends are paying attention to me
Don’t you guys call some small river boat a punt?
Yes, that’s true. So many uses, what a great word
I am going to start punting all over the place. I am going to be a total punt.
😀
Precisely.