You have been warned!!!

Posted on April 26, 2016 by pouringmyartout

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This blog is not for everybody! It contains thoughtful material, and requires you to use your mind. It contains humor, and requires you to laugh at things you never thought of laughing at. It contains satire and parody and sarcasm, which may not sound that bad… unless it happens to be aimed at something you hold dear.

This blog insults stupid people, racists, politicians, extremists, terrorists and other groups that I find annoying… if you are a stupid racist extremist terrorist politician, you probably shouldn’t poke around in here!

This blog takes normal, everyday things, and examines them from angles and in ways that you might not be used to… so if you get dizzy or suffer from motion sickness, stay out!

But the most insidious thing this blog contains is me… and my head full of crack squirrels and loads of free time and a penchant for making funny pictures in Photoshop…

If you ignore my warnings and do decide to explore the swamp that is my imagination… and you feel the urge to begin scrolling down into the depths of my soul… because this is my whole life here… please… wear sensible shoes… and bring some rope… and a flashlight… and a first aid kit… and some snacks and water bottles…

But please, feel free to talk to strangers… my followers are awesome, and are probably the least objectionable part of this blog… sigh…

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What… you thought that just anybody could come in here and read my blog???

Posted on April 26, 2016 by pouringmyartout

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No way! You have to pass background checks, and intelligence tests… you need clearance, and 47 forms of ID… you need people to vouch for your character… investigators will visit your blog, and the blogs you follow, and delve into your life… my minions will talk to your friends and your 4th grade teacher, asking probing questions… microbots will scurry down the power lines and find your computer and set up cameras in your home… we will hack your phone, and examine your bank accounts…

The very idea that just any random person could stroll in here and have access to the outpourings of my mind is just preposterous!

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I will believe Trump is ‘evolving’ when he does the following things…

Posted on April 24, 2016 by pouringmyartout

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  1. Admits that evolution is a thing…
  2. Apologizes to Rosie O’Donnell…
  3.  Apologizes to all the rest of the women on this planet…
  4.  Apologizes to Mexico…
  5. Apologizes to immigrants…
  6.  Apologizes to Muslims…
  7. Apologizes to walls…
  8. Has all his supporters who assaulted people arrested, and then apologizes to the victims of the assaults…
  9. Admits that he has no strong beliefs in anything, and will say or do anything to get elected…
  10. Admits that he isn’t really good at business so much as he is a cold-blooded opportunist who will crush anybody who gets in his way, and then leave a trail of broke investors and unemployed workers behind him…
  11. Admits that he isn’t anywhere near as religious as he pretends to be…
  12. Admits that he is inappropriately attracted to his own daughter…
  13. Admits that he is purposefully courting the worst elements of his own party, a party to which he feels no real ties, and doesn’t care if he destroys, as long as he can stay in the spotlight…
  14. Apologizes to that female newswoman from FOX news that he insulted early in his campaign…
  15. Apologizes to President Obama for that whole ‘birther’ thing…
  16. Lets us hold him upside down, just to see what the hell his hair would look like if it wasn’t constrained by gravity, hair spray, wires, and black magic…
  17. Admits that his ‘make America great again’ hats are made in China… by slave laborers… who are like 9-years-old…
  18. Admits that there is no way he can build the ‘wall’ he keeps talking about for anywhere near the amount of money he keeps talking about…
  19. Admits that his water company went bankrupt, his steaks never got sold to anybody, and his magazine was really a copy of a brochure for one of his hotels…
  20. Admits that, when he estimates his own financial worth, he adds 20 billion dollars to the total just because he thinks his own name is worth that much…
  21. Admits that most buildings that say ‘Trump’ on them weren’t built by him and aren’t owned by him, but are just licensing the name…
  22. Most of all, I would like to hear him come right out and say that he is conning people with this whole ‘business genius’ ploy, hoping that they will believe that he is going to run America like a fancy hotel, and that they will all end up living in the penthouse suites, when really it will be him, his family, and a few one-percenter friends living up there… and the rest of his supporters will be working as maids, or in the laundry, washing his gold sheets, or cleaning the pool, or washing his gold dishes…
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What do you know… it turns out the pen really is mightier than the sword…

Posted on April 23, 2016 by pouringmyartout

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Posted in My art, Pictures of me | Tagged , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Thank you, Mr. President…

Posted on April 23, 2016 by pouringmyartout

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Vlad, I know you are a fan… but stop being such a dickski…

Posted on April 23, 2016 by pouringmyartout

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A vision of the future…

Posted on April 22, 2016 by pouringmyartout

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Technically, this post belongs with the series of posts I am doing where I suggest that you all visit PhotoFunia.com and use their picture changing magic to add some artwork to your posts… Now, in fairness, I did have to do some extra Photoshop work to finish this picture… like adding his name to the building… and the eagle on top… and the red borders on the banners… and the pseudo-Nazi emblems… but I did use PhotoFunia.com to stick his face on three big banners… on a building that is not actually in America…

But I hope that you can see how, with a little patience, and some imagination, a picture will certainly cause people to stop when they are scrolling down wordpress topic walls full of blog posts and maybe drop by your blog to see what other kind of weird stuff you are up to.

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This is totally true, by the way…

Posted on April 22, 2016 by pouringmyartout

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Yes, I am still trying to show you the incredible benefits of adding amusing art to your blog posts to attract visitors and stand out from the crowd… I just wanted to put this one up above my last post… making fun of the size of Trump’s penis… to show how a clever title, combined with some eye-catching graphics, can make people who are scrolling down the topic walls where wordpress sticks our ‘tagged’ posts, notice you.

So go to PhotoFunia.com and try one of these amusing pictures yourself.

And it is true… I do have a blog post where we are trying to set the record for most comments on a wordpress blog post not run by a celebrity or a corporation… And it does indeed have 44,326 comments. You can find it over there—–> on the right—–> at the top of the sidebar—>… just click on the blue words and a link will take you there. If you are new, and haven’t left a comment yet, become a part of history by leaving a quick comment… or go in there and vent, or do stand up comedy, or reply to old comments… and meet some really interesting people.

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More tips to make your blog awesome… special ‘messing with Trump’ edition… part 2…

Posted on April 22, 2016 by pouringmyartout

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Oh come on… if that picture doesn’t make you want to try PhotoFunia.com for spicing up your blog posts, then nothing will. I didn’t spend hours in Photoshop doing that… like I do for lots of my posts… I uploaded a photo of Trump from Google images. Then, I even got to pick the news network and the banner headline… just by typing them in a box… and they did all the work!

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More tips to make your blog awesome… special ‘messing with Trump’ edition… part 1…

Posted on April 22, 2016 by pouringmyartout

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So, in my continuing effort to try to convince you to use the photo editing magic of Lunapic.com and PhotoFunia.com… which is where I did this picture… I have decided to branch off, and stop using this series as just another excuse to pimp my blog and put up even more pictures of my face… we will get back to that later… HA!

Plus, who doesn’t love it when we make fun of Trump???

But say you want to do a post called: ‘Trump is a fathead!!!’ Why the heck not add a picture of Trump… with a big fat head? You can do that, for free, with almost no effort… at PhotoFunia.com

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