This is where the crack squirrels that live inside my head come to play, hopefully keeping them too busy to chew on the wires up there.
Oh yeah, male bonding at its best.
So yeah, morning of the second day of our 3-and-a-half day trip to New York. It was pouring rain. My wife and daughter were going shopping, so my son-in-law and I did a little day-trip of our own, to the New York Metropolitan Museum of Art. They were having a special arms and armor exhibit.
Wet brownstones on the way to the museum. We had to take the subway and walk a mile or so in the rain.
Jason stopped to get a bagel… because, you know, New York.
I stood outside under and awning, taking pictures of a wet city.
A fountain in the rain. Is that extra cool, or just redundant?
Putting on our war-faces.
I love that kid. He makes my kid happy. He makes me happy. I have been making that ‘molecular-male-bonding joke for a long time now.
He was such a good sport. He humors me… a lot. But it wasn’t all arms and armor, as you shall see.
Oh, it is going to get weird around here.
It is amazing, the time and effort and technology we have utilized in the search for more efficient ways to do each other in.
Most ancient weapons and sets of armor that still survive belonged to rich people. They had space to store stuff, even after they got too fat to wear it or too old to use it. They had servants to oil and preserve their stuff.
Although that looks like it belonged to a regular guy.
Most of the things you are looking at cost more than a peasant made in their lifetime.
Not that that kept the rich asshats from giving the peasants a pointy stick and a leather shirt and making them do most of the fighting.
I was never a fan of using horses for war. I hate it, but thanks for at least giving them some protection.
But hey, a well-trained war horse was expensive.
Okay, we are coming up to the fancy butts… gun butts.
A very few of these might be hunting weapons.
But you must admit, the craftsmanship is incredible.
And now, the fanciest butt of all…
I flintlock pistol with a face on the butt. I couldn’t help but think that, if you hit someone with that… pistol-whipped… it would leave an impression… of that face.
Keep calm, and don’t lose your head, that is the main thing, right?
Why is my son-in-law standing in front of an ancient Roman mosaic floor? And why does he look so much like that guy in the tiles, handing the maiden a… flower arrangement? A fruit assortment? A horn of plenty?
Why does it look like we are in the chapel in an old castle?
What’s with the fancy coat of arms thingie?
How long did that guy have to stand around in his fancy party armor to have his portrait painted?
Which of those suits of armor would look best on Jason?
Why does that ancient Viking dagger look so uncomfortable to stab someone with? Did part of the handle rot away?
Is that a stirrup? When did they invent stirrups anyway? It seems like stirrups would really make swing a sword on horseback a lot easier, and couldn’t you use a lance more effectively?
Why is there a lady lurking behind that knight? And why is his shield so freekin’ big?
How many kinds of swords are there?
And what is really better for armored, hand-to-hand combat, a sword, or a mace, or a war hammer, or an axe? And why does your spell-checker underline ‘axe’ like it is not a real word? It is a real word, isn’t it?
Is that an upside-down mermaid on that helmet?
Wow, you ask really good questions. A lot of them. And the answers will be revealed. Maybe not the answers to these particular questions, but at least I will fill you in on where Jason and I went on our boys-day-out in New York.
Don’t get too excited.
When I say ‘final chapter’, I mean just of the wiggly pictures I took on the first night of our 3-and-a-half-day adventure in New York, standing by the East River and overlooking Manhattan across the river.
But you have survived to the last post of the first day. Now, let me see if I can explain why I love taking these photos.
Mostly, it is just that I never know how they will turn out until I look at them full-sized. Some are awesome. I find them artsy.
Also, I like the challenge of figuring out what combination of distance, lens, lighting and wiggle give the best result.
Also, there are things about this which I do not understand.
Why is it that some lights leave a complete, distinct line, while others seem to stutter and leave dots or dashes behind?
But yeah, mostly it is the wiggle. I try sweeps and swoops, up and down flicks, side to side swipes.
That one of the Brooklyn Bridge is barely wiggly.
And that one, of a skyscraper on the island across the way, seems to be repetitive up and down wiggle, with a slight curve. I may have been using the zoom lens on that one. Maybe I should be taking notes.
Now that is some world-class wiggling!
Okay, see you soon for the start of day two… which is going to contain lots of photos of penises. Yes, you heard me. Penis pictures. I am mostly telling you that to see if anybody is reading the words on these posts, but it is absolutely true. And yet, we will still stay within the framework of my more-or-less family-friendly blog. I hope.