The strange case of the multiplying balloons…

a 1

I was at work the other day, doing my sacred, sworn duty as a security guard, keeping the rich people who live in an exclusive community safe from any interaction with normal people who weren’t being paid to be there, when I spotted some hot air balloons nearby. As I have said, I see these all the time, so my main interest in them was to be sure they didn’t land inside the exclusive community, thereby forcing our residents to have to come face to face with people who were raised out in the wild.

a 2

I did… something… that kept me busy for a few moments, and then glanced up again at this incursion into our airspace. And now there were three balloons. Okay, no big deal, maybe I just counted wrong.

a 3

I did something… whatever it was… for another few moments, and glanced up again. Now there were four balloons. If the photos I took with my cell phone have led you to believe that more than a few brief moments had past, that is a false conclusion. The clouds have only moved in relation to where I stood when I stepped out to take the pictures. A total of less than one minute had past.

This has led me to leap to some obvious… but unlikely… conclusions of my own. Either we are developing stealth hot air balloons, or else there was some hot balloon sex action going on up in the clouds, and new balloons were being born.

Yes, I suppose they might have just risen from behind that line of trees, but that isn’t nearly as funny, is it?

a 4

Another sunset picture from my little guard house… which is actually almost half as big as my real house, better landscaped, and has a fancier, Spanish tile roof.

a 5

And a last photo of one of the balloons, thankfully passing right over the property… with its 800-or-so houses… which are all much larger than my own house. I joke with the other security officers that we should put anti-aircraft canons on the guard house roofs. But there is already a strategic plan of action to limit the number of times these majestic balloons infringe on our area of responsibility. We aren’t supposed to allow the follow trucks onto the property. This means that the balloon pilots and their paying passengers have to carry all the parts of the balloons… the big gas tanks, baskets, tubular metal frames, and the giant, rolled-up balloon itself… out of the property by hand, if they land inside. I have never seen this done yet. Maybe the other guards are just messing with me.

About pouringmyartout

You will laugh at my antics... That is my solemn promise to you... Or your money back... Stop on by...
This entry was posted in Stories of my life and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

12 Responses to The strange case of the multiplying balloons…

  1. weggieboy says:

    Well, hot air balloons were used in the US Civil War to observe enemy movements…. Your spidey sense that these intruders might pose a problem for the delicate sensibilities of “those for whom you are a guard against the unwashed, the unrich, and the unsavory who might want to upset us by reminding us they exist – ick!” may have been spottish on, sorta! Otherwise, it must have been fun watching them. Keep in mind, those balloons may cost someone $22,000 or so for a two passenger balloon and more the bigger the basket capacity, so they may be OK for a drop in… as long as they don’t get out of the basket!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s