This is what I spent most of today working on, the character and race… (species)… section of the fourth book in my action/humor science fiction series: The Otherwhere Chronicles. I include this portion in each novel, because there are a lot of characters and races to keep track of, and this is an easy way to cross-reference them. If you can’t remember who somebody is, or what they look like and how many eyes and tentacles and whatever they have, or how they fit into the story, this makes it easier. This is still in the early editing stage. But it shows that in this one book in the series, there are 63 individual characters… more, really, because I lump some into groups… and 22 unique species.
Just thought I would share this, so you know why I am so busy and haven’t been out taking photos of adventures in the Bay Area, even though I am here visiting my mom.
Characters and Races
In Order of Appearance
These notes are not part of the original alien manuscript that showed up on my doorstep. Because of the length of this manuscript, I have broken it down into a series of books. This might cause some confusion to the reader, especially if you are reading this book without having read the other books first. I resolved not to edit the story in any way, so returning characters are mentioned as if you already know who they are, what they look like, and what they have done in the past. These notes are just done in the order that a character appears or is mentioned in this particular book. Even if you did read the other books, I realize that all the alien races can still be hard to remember. If you cross-reference the character notes with the race notes found lower in this section, you should be able to get a fairly good idea of what each character looks like, what they do for a living, and how they fit into the story. I apologize for any confusion caused by leaving the story exactly as some unknown alien hand wrote it.
I am putting a ‘*’ beside the new characters and races that did not appear in the other books.
- H. Browne
He is the Brain-Friend for Ssseeeet. He is also the Executive Secretary of the Universe Company. He is one-and-a-half-feet-tall, bright blue, and looks like a toad. He never forgets anything and is very smart. You will learn more about Mr. Toad when I introduce Ssseeeet, or you can skip ahead and read about Ssseeeet near the bottom of the character and race notes. There is a four-way, symbiotic relationship, and it is complicated.
His last name is pronounced ‘Black’. He is human. He is the custodian at The Saloon At The Edge Of Everywhere, on an alien space station called the Hub. He led a small band of human and alien heroes, now being called ‘Arthur’s Avengers’, on a rescue mission on the Hub to save hostages from some space pirates. He also saved San Francisco from being vaporized. Oh, and he is now the CEO of The Universe Company, the biggest human/alien business conglomerate in the history of the universe, and he just found out that he has been made the Supreme Commander of the Combined Allied Defense Forces. He is cynical and sarcastic, but basically a nice guy. He has a problem with authority. He also has a piece of alien technology that looks like a small, triangular rock that helps him learn things. Strange things seem to happen around him.
He is a human
He is big
He is an old friend of Arthur’s… or is he?
Arthur ends up calling him Oops, at least in his own head. He is a Xxo. He was a bouncer for a group of alien supremacists. He is now Arthur’s bodyguard. He is huge and a little clumsy.
Ox- (Oxo Xxoxo)
People call him Ox. He is a Xxo. He is… or was… the bouncer at the saloon. He is now Head of Security at the Universe Co. He is one of Arthur’s Avengers, but Arthur doesn’t like him that much. He is very competitive. He can’t hold his liquor and he is a little bit of a jerk.
His real name is Xoo Xoox. His people used to call him the Warlord, but that was before he tore himself in half and thereby gave life to the new Warlord, whom he passed his title down to. Did you get all that? He is a Xxo. Humans sometimes call them the Giant Broccoli. He is the dishwasher at the saloon, among other things. He has an interesting history. He is green, very large, and has tentacles on both the upper and lower ends of his body.
He is a Xxo. He is the offspring of the Warlord, and he inherited the title of Warlord from the Warlord, who used to be the Warlord, but is now the General, got it? He is now the Chief of Operations for the Universe Co. He is very young and still learning. He is a natural warrior and tactician.
He is a Morlan from Morla. He was a comm tech on the Hub. He is the Communications and Technology Executive at the Universe Co. He is one of the Avengers. He is blue and rather short. He has a boney forehead ridge. He is a techno genius.
He is a Blob, but only because Arthur never learns the actual name of his race. He is an inventor…who used to be an arms merchant…who became a Christian. He is Izalie’s father. He is roughly Seven-feet-tall, and he looks like a semi-transparent lava lamp made of green Jell-O.
They might be a life-form, or they may be alien technology. Floating globes, they record and broadcast news and events all over the universe in every language.
Captain Janet Browne
She is human. She is the Captain of the U. S. S. S. (United States Space Ship) Obama, planet Earth’s first military space vessel.
People in his dimension call him the Doraimee which means ‘Overlord’. He is a Keelar. He is the supreme leader of The Black Empire and rules an entire dimension. I realize that we are only learning about him second hand, but it does seem that he is someone that we ought to be watching out for.
He is the Hand-Friend for Ssseeeet. He is an Executive Assistant at the Universe Company. He is one of the Avengers. He is three-feet-tall, bright red, hairless, has four arms, no tail, and looks like a very strong monkey. You will get to know Frodo when you read about Ssseeeet. I realize that this is confusing, but they don’t spend as much time doing what they used to do all the time.
He is a Xxo
He is Councilor/Commander of a Xxo battle fleet
The Prince, Baan Veen Var Steen
People call him the Prince, or ‘your Highness’. He is of the Tribes of Taaleem. He is- or was- a host/greeter at the saloon… except that now he is also a public relations executive for the Universe Company. He is one of the Avengers. He is fat and pop-eyed, with huge ears.
He is a Reaver. He is the commander of the Reaver mercenaries who worked for Enzyme Corp. He is tough and strong, and an expert at weapons and hand-to-hand combat. Arthur beat him in an unarmed duel, but that took place in an earlier book.
He is the Scout-Friend for Ssseeeet. You will find out about him when… you know, maybe you should have just read the first three books.
Captain Kelsey Hulls
She is human. She is a space freighter Captain. She used to work for Enzyme Corporation but now works for the Universe Company, commanding the Orion. She has a temper.
He is a human. He used to work on a freighter before he quit and ended up on the Hub, and now is a crewman on the Orion. He is one of the Avengers.
He is human. He was the CEO of Enzyme Corporation which has since been taken over, renamed The Universe Company, and is being run by Arthur and the Avengers. He is not a very nice man, but then again, who knows?
The Qualm do not really have individual personalities, so I am not quite sure which Qualm might be sent to help Arthur, but one of them is a member of Arthur’s Avengers and the Head of Moral at the Universe Company… or maybe all of them are… because they all share their thoughts. They are always in mental contact with one another, no matter how widely separated they are. They are empathic. They can’t actually read minds, but they can pick up emotions and tell if someone is lying. They have beautiful, veil-like floating bodies, and faces like a bowl of writhing spaghetti.
The Giant Flying Pickles
The real name of their race is the Shann. These mysterious, multidimensional beings are the ones who seed life throughout the universe after every Big Bang. But then they discovered the humans, the first ‘wild’ race to evolve on their own. They use small devices to store the memories of their race, and Arthur now has one. He calls it the memory stone.
(No race, he is a robot.) There are five of them. He is a death machine with a cute little girl’s voice.
We never learn the name of her race, but Arthur calls them Blobs. She is Tarlek Da’s daughter. She looks like a lava lamp made of green Jell-O, but she can look like other things too. She is a young child, but then again, they live 500 or 600 years. She is about four-feet-tall. You can see through her. Arthur likes her a lot.
*The Other Arthur Blacke
He is human. He is the commander of the first wave of the invasion fleet. He looks like our Arthur, but with long hair and more muscles.
He is a Keelar. He is a troop leader.
He is the size, shape and color of a football. He has a great white shark’s mouth, four legs, and multiple eyes. He does not like electricity.
She is human. She is a sub-commander of the first wave invasion fleet.
He is human. He is a sub-commander of the first wave invasion fleet.
*Merry, *Pippin, *Sam, *Bilbo
Two Brain-Friends and Two Scout-Friends. They are the representatives of two Slug captains of the allied fleet. (‘Slug’ is not the actual name of the race, they are the Muccassim, but they do look like really big banana slugs, so that is what many humans call them.) Once again, you will just have to be patient and wait until we introduce Ssseeeet near the end of the story.
They are Vaccurians. They are captains of the allied fleet. They look like big, metal bugs.
*Four Gomai Captains
Arthur never learns their names, but then, two Gomai did chase him for a few days once and try to kill him numerous times. They are captains of the allied fleet. They look like the love child of an upright-walking alligator and an oversized-gila monster.
He is a Tinnjjee. He is a ship leader of the allied fleet. They are crustaceans and look like large sand crabs. They can’t pronounce the letter ‘L’.
*A Tarry Captain
He never mentions his name. He is a captain of the allied fleet.
*Four Bat (or Trex) Captains
We do not learn their names. There are two Princes, an Earl and a Duke. They are captains of the allied fleet.
He is a Morlan. He is a war officer of the allied fleet.
They are Wasp Whips. They are captains of the allied fleet. Wasp Whips is a name for their race coined by Arthur in the first book of this series. They are tall and thin and stripey.
*Six Skalarin Captains
Arthur forgets their names as soon as he hears them. They are captains of the allied fleet. They look like walking fish. They have power boomerangs.
*Toovo *Rudis *Rovan-
They are Reavers. They are patrol ship leaders of the allied fleet. Rovan is a female.
*Four Forthisa Captains
Arthur doesn’t bother trying to remember their names. They are captains of the allied fleet. They are seven-feet-tall with four arms. Their bones are on the outside, so they are sort of inside out. They still own slaves, but not because they want to!
*Four Chasa (Do they even have names?)
They are the slaves of the Forthisa because they do not want to have to look for a job. They are three-and-a-half-feet-tall. They have heads that look like a bulldog’s heads and are very cute.
He is a Xxo. He is also a battle fleet commander and representative of the Xxo council.
They are Keelar. They are technicians, at least the Keelar version of technicians. You might want to pay attention to these two.
*Vitar Nomsinica Devleonis the 47th
He is a Dram. He is a sub-commander in lead element of the 2nd wave of the invasion. He is also, it turns out, a Prince. He looks like an elephant seal wearing a uniform.
*Vinar Nomsinica Preyastener the 212th
He is a Dram. He is the Grand Commander of the 2nd wave of the invasion. He is also the Regent and brother of the Dram King. He looks like an elephant seal wearing a big, fancy hat with a purple plume.
*The Baby Shann
He is a Shann, or a very small Giant Flying Pickle. He is also a prisoner of the Keelar.
*Fawsanth *Selthuth *Turthis
They are Proteks. They are scientists. They are also slaves of the Keelar. They look like orangutans with moss-green fur.
He is a Reaver. He is just happy to be out of prison.
*The Two Gomai
We never learn their names. They are Fahh’s guards, I guess.
*The Other Arthur’s Family
We never find out their names. They are human. The lovely wife and two daughters our Arthur never had. They are delightful, and he is more than a little jealous.
The Missing Protek… Or is he the last survivor of his people in this universe?
We do not know his name. He is a homeless drunk sleeping on a park bench in Berkeley.
He is a Tarry. He is head cook at the saloon. He says he was badly burned, but it’s hard to tell. He is orange, fat, bald, and looks like Buddha. He is five-feet-tall.
He is human. He was a ship’s purser on the Disney space liner, Disney Star. He is now the Chief Financial Officer of the Universe Company. He is one of Arthur’s Avengers.
He is human. He is the piano player in the saloon. He is one of the Avengers.
She is human. She is a waitress at the saloon, but she might end up being talked into becoming the Executive Receptionist of the Universe Company. She is one of Arthur’s Avengers. She fiercely loves the General. She is both sweet and warm, as her name implies.
The President of the United States.
His name is Charlie Morrow. He is human, or as close to human as a politician can be.
Jane Blacke (Arthur’s mother)
She is human. She is Arthur’s mom, and she is one feisty old woman. She lives on Earth in the San Francisco Bay Area.
*wwWwwW WWww wwwWw (Mr. Feety-Jammies)
Arthur calls him Mr. Feety-Jammies. He is a wwWwwwW WWwww. (Never mind, you can’t pronounce it anyway.) He wears a one-piece jumpsuit of sky blue that also covers his feet, hence the name. He is tall, gaunt, and purple like an eggplant. He sings like a whale. Once again, you may have to go back and read some of the earlier books if you want to learn more about him.
He is a Muccassim. Humans call them Slugs because they look like really big slugs. He is the General Manager of the Universe Company. He is one of the Avengers. He has no hands, and communicates by wiggling his eye stalks. I told you we would get to all this sooner or later.
He has three Helper-Friends:
- Mr. Toad
He is the Brain-Friend; He does the remembering and the talking for Ssseeeet. He is the Executive Secretary of the Universe Co. He is one of the Avengers. He is one-and-a-half-feet-tall, bright blue, and looks like a toad. He never forgets anything and is very smart.
He is the Hand-Friend; He does the work that requires hands for Ssseeeet. He is an Executive Assistant at the Universe Co. He is one of the Avengers. He is three-feet-tall, bright red, hairless, has four arms, no tail, and looks like a muscular monkey.
He is the Scout-Friend; He helps Ssseeeet run errands and find things. He is an Executive Assistant at the Universe Co. He is one of the Avengers. He is three-feet-tall, thin, pale green, and has huge, luminous eyes.
(The Helper-Friends had no names of their own until Arthur named them).
The Baron, Meen Veel Var Steen
People call him the Baron. He is of the Tribes of Taaleem. He is/was the head waiter at the saloon, and/or a public relations executive for the Universe Company. He is one of the Avengers. He is older and rather thin.
He is a Stleeb. Humans call them Dick-heads, but try not to do it to their faces. He is now an executive at the Universe Company. He is one of the Avengers. It is not easy going through life with a very big penis sticking out of the top of your head! But other than that, he looks a lot like a human. Well, except for the very large testicles on his chest that look like breasts.
He is human. He is the owner of The Saloon At The Edge Of Everywhere, and Head Bartender. He is a crusty old varmint, but nice enough in his own way.
Professor Fernando Finalis (The Professor)
People call him the Professor. He is human. He is an Historian, writing the history of everything but Earth. He is also now the head of research and development at the Universe Company. He is one of Arthur’s Avengers. He is a sweet old guy with hair like a clown. He found the memory stone, which has access to all the historic information of the Giant Flying Pickles, a mysterious and ancient multidimensional race.
His real name is Wasilahskiphara-something-or-other- but Arthur calls him Skip. He is a Vaccurian. He is the Head Cargo Chief of the Hub. He is a big, silver insect.
Humans call them ‘Giant Broccoli’. No one knows how to pronounce Xxo. If it helps, here is how I pronounce it; it rhymes with ‘show’, but starts with a soft ‘j’ sound, or ‘zh’ maybe. They look a little like two-ended giant broccoli, or two sea anemones stuck together at the base. They are at least eight-feet-tall, just to where their top tentacles start. They have tentacles on top and bottom. They have eyes all around the center of their torsos like a belt and can focus any or all of them. They have multiple mouths that are vertical slits that circle trunk between each eye. They are green with purple swirls and veins like marble. They give birth by dividing from top to bottom. The slightly-larger-half maintains the original personality, while the other half makes a new individual. They live for thousands of years. They tend to sway back and forth when drunk or angry. They think in terms of strategy and have a very military mindset.
They look like generic Star Trek aliens from the original series. They are blue, four-and-a-half-feet-tall, and have boney ridges running sideways on their foreheads. They have just holes for ears. They also happen to be experts at technology.
The real name of this race remains unknown, but Arthur calls them the Blobs. They look like green Jell-O molds shaped like lava lamps. They are about Seven-feet-tall when fully grown. They live for 500 or 600 years. You can see their internal organs because they are semi-transparent. They can be very inventive.
They are floating white spheres the size of bowling balls. They observe and report on all interesting events and then they pass this information instantly through space to each other. They also pass the news to any race that wants it, projected in the needed language and utilizing the technology required. Nobody knows if they are a race or an invention.
They look like the love child of a football and a jack-o-lantern, and are not much larger than either of those things. They have four legs and six eyes. They live in a totalitarian regime. They are the bad guys. Trust me, we are going to be learning more about them.
The Bats- (The Tribes of Taaleem)
Humans call them ‘Bats’ or sometimes Trexes, which is just a short version of T-Rex, because they do look a little like small versions of those ferocious animals. They are two feet tall or so. They are reptilian bat-like creatures with black scaly skin and vestigial wing membranes under their arms. At one time they adapted to flight, but they didn’t like it. They have three-tipped tails. They have a Feudal, very hard to fathom social structure. They are masters of court intrigues and plots. Royal families make up about 98% of their race. There are very few commoners. There is also no money left in royal coffers. There has been much inbreeding. This has weakened the bloodlines and caused a trend toward freakish genetic traits. Huge ears, overbites, sloping foreheads, and so on, are quite common. They are very sociable, but pompous and stuck up. They like to put on airs. They were the second alien race to land on Earth.
They look a little like friendly talking hippopotami, but they are not all that friendly.
They have big tusks jutting from their lower jaw. They are tough and vicious and hire themselves out as mercenaries. They also make high-tech weaponry.
They are empathic. They have no individual names. They have a group personality. They are six feet or so in height, thin, blue, and translucent, like floating veils. They would be beautiful if they didn’t have faces like a bowl of wiggling spaghetti. They float around without touching the ground. They feel the emotions of most races but can’t really read minds. They tend to react to alien thoughts incorrectly and misinterpret things. They are prone to quick judgments, overreaction, hysterics, melancholy. They worry about everyone’s moods. They are gossips and busybodies. They love to help, they just don’t usually know how.
The Shann (the Giant Flying Pickels)
Humans call them the Giant Flying Pickles. They look like giant pickles, but they can fly. They are multidimensional. They are virtually indestructible. They can grow to be three hundred feet long, but the young ones are only thirty to forty feet in length. They travel and explore through space, and through other dimensions. They are the beings responsible for bringing life back to all the universes after every cycle ends, and humans are the first race to evolve without their help. They live forever, or so some folks say. They were the first alien race to discover Earth.
They are big, silvery insects. They are very good at manual labor.
They have alligator-like heads, lots of teeth and claws, thick, armored skin, and wear armor shirts. They have clear eyes like crystal balls. They are at least Six-feet-tall. They are relentless, tough killers when following orders.
They are crustaceans. They look like large sand crabs. They have scary mouths with little claws surrounding them.
They tend towards obesity, and are orange, bald, and look like melted Buddha candles.
The Wasp Whips
The name for this race was invented by Arthur, the real name being long and unpronounceable by most races. Adults are usually at least fifteen-feet-tall, and wasp-striped in gold and black. Teenage males are tossed off the home planet every year when they reach puberty and they start causing too much trouble for the adults to put up with, and this led to some trouble in the first book.
They look like fish walking upright. They are four-or-so-feet-tall. They fight with power boomerangs.
They are seven-feet-tall and have four arms. They are inside out…their bones are on the outside (creepy). They still own slaves but are trying to give it up.
They are three-and-a-half-feet-tall. They look like walking English Bulldogs. They are the slaves of the Forthisa. They do not want to be freed, because that would be too much responsibility.
They look like elephant seals. They have huge, wobbly noses and pink and gray skin.
They look like orangutans with moss-green fur. They are a race of scientists and inventors who are now slaves to the Keelar. There are only three of them left, unless you count the two million eggs… or maybe not.
The wwWwwwW WWwww
(Never mind, we can’t pronounce it anyway.) Arthur calls the one he met Mr. Feety-Jammies. They are tall, thin, and hairless, and have tall-skulled heads. They are dark purple, like an eggplant. They come from a barren, frozen world. They are so lonely and depressed.
The Muccassim (Slugs)
Humans call them ‘Slugs’. They look like giant slugs. Their mouths are not good for speech. They have no hands. They are roughly five-feet-long, mottled, stripy brownish yellow black, and tend to be a little slimy. They rely on their Helper-Friends in many ways.
There are three Helper-Friend Races:
They look like toads that can stand up. They are bright blue in color. They stand about one-and-a-half-feet-tall. They are very wise, and remember almost everything they ever see or learn. They translate and speak for the Slugs.
They look like three-foot-tall, bright red, hairless monkeys with four arms and big muscles. They build and carry and fix things for their Slugs. They wear little silver vests with lots of pockets to carry things.
They are about three-feet-tall. They are pale green in color, and have huge eyes. They tend to be scrawny. They find things and run errands for the Slugs.
The Stleeb (Dick-heads)
Humans call them Dick-heads, but not to their faces, usually. They look almost human in basic shape, except that the males have penises two or three feet long emerging from the tops of heads which hang back like a ponytail. Their huge testicles are located on their chests, and look a little like human female breasts. They do not wear clothing. Their color is similar to Caucasian humans, and they are hairless. Their knees bend backwards, the opposite of our knees. They have three fingers on each hand. Females stay on their home world.