- Admits that evolution is a thing…
- Apologizes to Rosie O’Donnell…
- Apologizes to all the rest of the women on this planet…
- Apologizes to Mexico…
- Apologizes to immigrants…
- Apologizes to Muslims…
- Apologizes to walls…
- Has all his supporters who assaulted people arrested, and then apologizes to the victims of the assaults…
- Admits that he has no strong beliefs in anything, and will say or do anything to get elected…
- Admits that he isn’t really good at business so much as he is a cold-blooded opportunist who will crush anybody who gets in his way, and then leave a trail of broke investors and unemployed workers behind him…
- Admits that he isn’t anywhere near as religious as he pretends to be…
- Admits that he is inappropriately attracted to his own daughter…
- Admits that he is purposefully courting the worst elements of his own party, a party to which he feels no real ties, and doesn’t care if he destroys, as long as he can stay in the spotlight…
- Apologizes to that female newswoman from FOX news that he insulted early in his campaign…
- Apologizes to President Obama for that whole ‘birther’ thing…
- Lets us hold him upside down, just to see what the hell his hair would look like if it wasn’t constrained by gravity, hair spray, wires, and black magic…
- Admits that his ‘make America great again’ hats are made in China… by slave laborers… who are like 9-years-old…
- Admits that there is no way he can build the ‘wall’ he keeps talking about for anywhere near the amount of money he keeps talking about…
- Admits that his water company went bankrupt, his steaks never got sold to anybody, and his magazine was really a copy of a brochure for one of his hotels…
- Admits that, when he estimates his own financial worth, he adds 20 billion dollars to the total just because he thinks his own name is worth that much…
- Admits that most buildings that say ‘Trump’ on them weren’t built by him and aren’t owned by him, but are just licensing the name…
- Most of all, I would like to hear him come right out and say that he is conning people with this whole ‘business genius’ ploy, hoping that they will believe that he is going to run America like a fancy hotel, and that they will all end up living in the penthouse suites, when really it will be him, his family, and a few one-percenter friends living up there… and the rest of his supporters will be working as maids, or in the laundry, washing his gold sheets, or cleaning the pool, or washing his gold dishes…
Evolution is a slow process, and it can take millions of years. So I think if he does just one of the things in the next 100 years, that could still count. And I think he already did #12 and possibly #14.
but not when I was watching…