Now that you have turned yourself into a cartoon character, it is time to use the new you to help you to reach new levels of hilarity. In fact, the very fact that the facts of life no longer apply to you will help you to be funnier.

My good friend, Dick Cheney, will now help me demonstrate how funny it is to have an anvil drop on somebody’s head…

Okay, obviously in my rush to finish this post I made a horrible mistake. I had to go to the DMV this morning to renew my license and the computers in all the DMV offices in California are not working for some reason, and I spent two hours in line for nothing. When I got home Dick had already been waiting for me for more than twenty minutes and you know how busy he is being creepy and looking for new hearts… and… to make a long story short, we rushed the project and the anvil was dropped on the living person instead of the cartoon character who could have survived the experience with no problem at all.

Fortunately Dick also has unnatural powers that allow him to survive such an event… rather like a cockroach… and his head will resume its normal… well, normal might be stretching the point a little, but it will return to what it looked like before I dropped an anvil on it… in about a week.

Even more fortunately, for the sake of a post where I am trying to teach you all how to be funny, there are very few people in history that it is more amusing to watch having their head crushed by a falling anvil than Dick…