But I am doing this at the bequest of my friend Le Clown. It was just a little musing I once did on how much blogging and dating have in common…
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Blogging and dating are essentially the same thing.
There, I said it. Maybe it is clear to me because I am so new at this. Or maybe I am just plain wrong. I hope I am.
There you are, a young, vulnerable, lonely new blog, putting yourself out there. Cruisin’ the single’s scene. Lookin’ for a little action.
You send out your message; that you are available, that you might be interested in a relationship.
You put on some fancy artwork that makes you look hot. Not too hot, you don’t want to send the wrong message.
You put out a few posts, displaying your charms and wit.
You get your first hits. You are intrigued. You are touched.
Then you start hanging out in various blog topic lists in the reader, just sort of checking for potential suitors.
Someone catches your eye. They seem funny, friendly. Their graphics are impressive.
You click, and start to explore their point of view. You learn more about them.
Hey, you realize, I like what this person has to say. We have stuff in common. You make a few comments.
You hope they will notice you, but there are a lot of other people that like this person. And some of them are better commenters than you are.
You bring out some of your best commenting. Hey, you have been noticed.
Is it too early to ask this person over to your place to check out some of your stuff? But you really do like them. You pushed their like button twice.
What if they come over and don’t like you as much as you like them?
That would suck, because you are ready to follow this person anywhere.
Ooh, they do like your stuff. Your words are brilliant, your colors vibrant.
But did they really listen when you wrote? How many posts did they really go back to?
You begin to have your doubts, but before you know it, you are both following each other. You were just sort of swept up in the emotions of the moment.
Weeks go by, and the things that you thought were so clever now begin to grate on your nerves.
Turns out that the jokes they were making were funny when they were talking about the other political party, but now, not so much.
Besides, you have started to become interested in other blogs. There has been a little harmless flirting with other sites.
You find yourself faking it now and then, pretending you were paying more attention than you really were.
Worst of all, what if you follow someone and they don’t follow you back.
Oh, no, blogging and dating have absolutely nothing in common. It was all in my head.
The funny part to me is that we could all end up ‘following’ everybody. It would be like Days Of Our Lives. We all end up together for at least one night.
Pouring My Art Out 
You’re such a marroon!
I know.
Now I’m afraid to comment anywhere new out of fear I’ll be reduced to a cheap stereotype. A whore, as it were. What if my prose blows and I’m the last to know?
I thought my blogging experience was unique but here you’ve boiled it down to a series of tired old cliches that have been played out since the dawn of dating. Thanks a lot. I walk around thinking I’m one in a million and it turns out I’m a dime a dozen.
Ummm…
First things first. Pay no attention to what anybody says on my blog…especially me.
But the thing about dating is that after you get over the feeling of being just another piece of walking meat on this planet, you might end up finding the one person that you truly connect with. And if that person just happens to be me, well, there isn’t anything wrong with that… we just wont tell the wives and kids about our special connection… HA!
I’m afraid that you have not adequately (or yet) addressed the problem of blogwhores. They are quite common and flip from blog to blog liking everything and befriending everyone they find. But are they to be seen the next day or the next week or the next year? Oh no. Never that. Blogwhores can be male or female or in-between, and are occasionally animals. I have encountered many of them. They are smelly, write bad poetry, and have poorly-formed prose. I do not think you are a blogwhore, my friend. I would have to come up with a different, equally-clever term for you, but I do not yet know what that may be.
I was going to put one in the porno movie.
Your porno is at best softcore, my friend. Blogwhores are hardcore porn all the way.
I concede the point.
That has got to be a first.
Not with you it isn’t… most other people, yes.
Don’t get all mushy on me now.
sorry
Blogbutterfly? Oh, and I don’t write poetry.
I think the next mission on this man’s blog is to find an appropriate blogtitle for the blogthings he does. I hope you’re not suggesting that he’s a blogbutterfly; or are you suggesting that you are one? Anyway, I will toss the first stone. I would like to nominate Art as the world’s first blogstud.
I was suggesting “blogbutterfly” for Art. He flies from blog to blog, from topic to topic, never serious, always colorful, and we can’t help but follow. But I can understand the appeal of “blogstud”.
I do not ‘butterfly’… I flutter by…
blogstudbutterfly?
We should order T-shirts…
Wet t-shirts?
Well duh…
I would like to thank all the little people…
blogmidget?
For the vertically and grammatically challenged amongst us.
Don’t forget the emotionally challenged. Some of us are extremely emotionally challenged.
Now you made me cry and scream with rage… you are so wrong about us…
I am the heartless evil scourge that oozes from the puss on a rotund man’s ass.
The puss??? As in boots?
That could possibly be very uncomfortable.
Any way you slice it.
Uh oh… is trouble brewing in paradise?