I am getting mixed messages on this new idea of mine where we all gather together in an orgy of writing and create the funniest, most artistic, over the top porno movie of all time. Some of you have been strangely silent. On the other hand, there was a huge bulge in my stats since I started this project… which is delicious irony, if you think about it… and sort of sums up our conflicted views on sex and sexuality.
Once again I would like to stress that this isn’t about just writing graphic love scenes. We need to be clever, inventive, poetic, and leave something to the imagination.
We have reached the last critical stage before we can begin to write the actual script. We need to pick a name and a theme. And we have had some… interesting suggestions. Now don’t worry about this too much. The theme will just be the place where our lusty adventure begins. We can still take it to anywhere else with anyone else that strikes our fancy.
Without further ado, I give you the list. Please vote for a favorite name and theme.
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Pouring My Art Out . . . of His Clothes!…Art is a cleaner on a space station who gets cleaned right out of his clothes by an alien masquerading as a human woman. He doesn’t discover her ruse until they are romping on the bed & her extra arms come about him.
***(That is a new one, and my personal favorite, so I moved i9t to the top of the list)***
*Thirty two triple D, or not thirty two triple D, that is the question… a saucy play by Mr. Shakespeare…
* Napoleon’s Bonerparty… what he lacked in size, he more than made up with in sexy strategies…
*It’s bigger on the outside… Dr. Who makes time stand still for the ladies…
*Indiana Moans Loudly in the Temple of Boom Chica Boom Boom… Will he wear his hat in bed, and what about that whip?
*The spy who loved me, and 12 other guys… Bond is back on his back…
*The Cat in the Hat Came Over my Back… Wrong on so many levels…
*Miley Cyrus in Hannah Mounts Anna… Well, she wants to change her image…
*To boldly go where many men have gone before… Capt. Kirk goes to Uranus…
*Titus A Duck’s Anicus… Those Romans knew how to party, but we will have to see where the duck comes in..
*All’s Well That Ends Happy… I think the immortal bard was writing hard…
*One fish, two fish, red fish, blew fish… Dr. Seuss for adults only…
*David Copper Feel… You can’t say my followers aren’t literate…
*1984 Dicks… Dysfunctional utopia meets girls from dysfunctional families???
*Catch 22 STDs… The irony writes itself…
*Four whores and seven beers ago… Honest Abe frees himself…
*she wanted some jewelry, so I gave her a pearl necklace… this also works with the pirate theme…
*Twerking off… wait… is Miley old enough to do an adult film?
*It was the best of times it was the worst of times, it was the age of hypocrisy, it was the age of censorship, it was the epoch of relief, it was the epoch of sensuality. Enter Rockin’ Ramona licking her lips and swiveling her hips… A little long for a title, but once again, give it up for my well-read and rather twisted followers…
*Whoops you did me again… I know Brittany Spears is old enough…
*Just take Hamlet and reimagine it with death scenes made into sex scenes… Once again, not really a title, but it does make you think…
*Back in Back… AC/DC parties backstage…
*I do not like green eggs and sperm… Sure, we wont get sued if we use that one…
*The Dickleration of Independence… Never have sex with anyone who has wooden teeth…
*Star Whores – A long time ago in a vagina far, far away… Now that Disney bought the franchise, I say this is fair game…
*The Incredible Bulk… He’s mean, green and will bruise your spleen…
* Midsummer Night Cream… oh Willie…
*The curse of the brown pearl… Capt. Sparrow is pacing the poop deck…
* I never thought this would happen to me… I don’t know if that was a title suggestion, but I put it in anyway…
*Cum together… a Beatles themed sex farce…
*50 Shades of Blog… Oh, wow…
*Bonnie’s Blog Glob… We would be writing to our core audience…
*Bringing the Kinks Out… Live musical performance???
*Hot Fingers… Okay then…
*Slippery Social Sluts… That sounds a little too much like a regular porno…
*Arts parts… Do we really need to bring me into this???
*The flog blog… More pirates and whips…
*Who is Sanchez and why is he so filthy? A pornumentary… Just brilliant…
*Sex wrecks. Real life stories of bad dates… I love my followers…
*Alpaca Lips Now…a slightly twisted tale of animal husbandry, a god complex, and lots and lots of uniforms… And that is just the opening scene???
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I mixed mine in so I wouldn’t have an unfair advantage… Now pick one so we can get the show on the road!
Pouring My Art Out 
I always thought that Doctor Suess books were all secretly dirty …..
That might say more about you than about him… just sayin’… ha!
No doubt about that. 😀
HA!
The Art of Flogging
The Tale of Art’s Elipses
The Trials and Tribulations of (insert sexy word/ words)
Suggestions for words to insert: Learning BDSM, Becoming a Master, Being Naughty, Submission, Domination…
More insertions… Trusting, Learning the Art, Torture
Do we really want to turn this particular group of people loose with the theme of torture on their minds???
I happen to like torture…
Too much of even a good thing… but Dick Cheney sort of messed up the whole torture thing for me…
That’s the thing about Dicks… they can screw things up over and over again.
They are always running off half cocked, blowing their tops, their egos need constant stroking, they are so rigid in their thinking, just standing around spouting their vile thoughts, their heads all swollen, trying to shaft the rest of us, stick it to us, shoving themselves where they don’t belong… jerks…
and they have those hair, round feet…
Is it weird that all those words together kind of excited me?
If by that you mean you find my brilliance stimulating, then yes… and no…
Oh, so now you’re referring to it as “brilliance”. If only I could touch your brilliance…
You might burn your fingers.
damn it… hairy round feet… I got carried away…
Slow down there… you don’t want to be premature…
I am too immature to be premature…
You suddenly seem to be almost frighteningly in the mood for this… did someone have a good Friday night?
I’m like this all the time 😉
Being like this for the normal weird stuff I do is one thing… but porno… really?
You have no idea what it’s like in here!!!
Wait… are you trying to tell ME that?????
Yes. Few people understand what that even means.
You don’t know if you ever had a close relative that was put up for adoption do you?
I don’t think so… but I’m pretty sure we knew each other in our past lives.
I will settle for that.
You do understand that we have moved past the suggestion phase into the voting phase, right?
Yes, but this is more fun than voting.
Yeah it is…
How I Became His Slave
I like where this is going… … … … …
Do you?
I like where everything is going… going is the fun part… disappointment only sets in once you arrive.
It’s not so much about the destination as it is the journey… and I LOVE to travel!
Me too. Been lots of places.
I bet you have! I hope you don’t intend on stopping anytime soon…
No… but I bring more people with me when I travel now…
Hmm. There’s nothing wrong with that at all! Just means better adventures!
Right.
My Affliction Addiction
We all have needs…
Some more than others…
Tell me about it.
His Elipses is Growing!!!
Yeah they are… and I am getting rather fond of seeing your smiling face stacked up in my comment menu…
Aww thank you 🙂 You’re fun to um comment with…
I do try to be entertaining… thanks.
No one wants to see my dangling ellipses…
…
…
It would be more like , you know… just one , cuz of the shrinkage
You never know… some people do have ellipses obsessions…
If you don’t use them…
My ellipses obsession isn’t discriminative (I think I just made up a word) I appreciate ellipses in all their natural states.
…ooo000
look out… they are getting bigger…
Ouch! My eye!!!
a math based porno movie… I suck at math… ha!
Binary code! Perfect! With all the 1’s and 0’s…
1 goes into 0 how many times? HA!!!
Lol good one! My guess would be as many times as it takes to be equal
Get sum… now that is a title for a math based porn flick!
BAM!
Let’s do some multiplyin’…
Leather and Lace
See, now that is tasteful and sexy… but since no one is even voting, I am at a loss as to how to proceed.
Just pick one of my amazing options! Easy!
I may just end up doing that if the action doesn’t pick up a little. I don’t know if people will actually write this or not… I am getting lots of views and likes but no votes…
Hey, I’m in… that counts for something, right?
It counts for everything.
Just pick one of mine, they are the bdst I promise
Did I hit the send button twice?
I don’t know, did you? You like double-clicking the mouse, huh?
I have twitchy fingers.
Hmm. Seems like you’re nervous… or had too much coffee… or just haven’t clicked a mouse for awhile…
Crack squirrels in my head, remember.
Are you sure they’re not gerbils? That would explain a lot…
Rats maybe…
Bases Loaded
ooohhh… a baseball theme… America’s favorite pastime…
Two balls and one strike!
Hmm… thats a whole new ballgame in my mind
So I’m not going to get to second base? HA!!! I kill me!
I never said that…
I don’t have the organized sports gene…
It’s okay… this isn’t organized at all… shhhhh
Good point.
The Secret Life of Art… Part 1: (enter word(s) such as… Out of the Closet… or Finding His True Passion… or The Beginning of His Pleasure
Oh sure, we could make this all about me… what could possibly go wrong with that?
It would be fun. See, I’ve actually done this before. Well not THIS exactly but something very similar
Tell me more.
Telling you more here would be way too public!
True…
An Excess of Explosions
Is there really such a thing??? But an action/adventure porn would be cool… sort of a Die Hard spinoff…
Hard spinoff??? You have no idea where that one is taking me!
Now I am thinking a scene needs to be filmed on an amusement park ride…
Ooohhh, nice! Add some cotton candy… definitely doable
Definitely doable… omg… that is the title of our movie right there!!! You are a freakin’ genius!!!!!
Finally someone recognized my intelligence! !!
I don’t know if it counts when I do it…
But you’re sooooooo good at it!
Everybody looks brilliant to me.
Should I have mentioned that I write Erotica? Literotica…
Maybe I should make you ineligible to participate as you have lost your virgini… your amateur status…
That would make me cry 😦
I will not be swayed by such obvious manipulation and blatant attempts to… awwww… who am I kidding… I can’t say no to you… (another good title idea, by the way)…
Hmm. So you can’t say no to me huh? This has endless possibilities…
You can make anything sound dirty… that is a true gift…
Yes. It’s also a curse sometimes. But mostly entertaining and pleasurable.
Nature is funny that way.
This is all very mild by the way, compared to the way I get when I am free to say anything I please…
This, as a happily married man, is as close to the wind as I sail.
ha… have you ever noticed that I really am frightfully amusing?
Obviously… I’m still conversing with you…
oh… right…
Indeed.
Oh… this is all in good fun! I was speaking of my own work when I said this is mild compared to when I’m free to say whatever I think! ^..^
Oh, I know what you meant.
My personality and sense of humor occasionally send the wrong message or get me in trouble 😦
Not at all.
The word “kumquat” just came in my head…
That happens to me a lot too…
Uh oh… here we go again…
yeah we do.
Here Cums the Bride
I’m sure that has been done,
Cumming to America
or on america
The Cumfort Zone
Cumfort food.
A cooking/food based reality adult show.
Gettin Jizzy Wit It
Ha.
The Jizsaw Puzzle
Thin Jizzy…
The Exxxcape ARTist
XXX Marks the Spot. Pirates, math, geography and geometry.
XXX Marks the G Spot!!!
Don’t be one-uppin’ me on my own blog!
I can’t help it… it’s like you said earlier… it just cums natural
Now is your time to shine! The movie script has started. Let the world see what you are made of… so to speak.
I know… I saw that at like 3am but my brain had shut down by then (yes, even my brilliant mind requires some recharging now and then…)
You need fresh batteries to keep the vibrations going.
I’m gonna give off good vibrarions…
I’m picking up… no… too obvious…
Wait… wtf is a vibrarion? Guess I’m not fully charged yet…
Is that for me or the movie???
For you… well not for YOU for you… don’t worry… I’m awake enough to comment on the correct post when I’m ready fof the real deal 😉
I will be back then.
It is an ancient musical instrurment…
Of torture
same thing.
Omg! Vibrarian! A library with built in vibrators on the chairs!!!!! (The chairs are called vibrarians, obviously)…. maybe with some type of blowup doll effect for the dudes…
Wont get much reading done…
That’s because this “library” is a special library… of only erotica. Make sense now? Books on tape are obviously the most popular…
Books on duct tape…
We are cumming up with some orgasmic comedy here, ya know it? This post in itself should be very entertaining to readers everywhere
If anybody was reading it.
The Orgasmic Fruit Aisle
Food would be fun… I picture lots of bananas and cucumbers.
Are cucumbers fruit?
Only the gay ones… not that there is anything wrong with that… HA!
And that happens to me a lot too.
Four Whores and Seven Beers Ago for the win.
That was mine… you have good taste.
I enjoy false retellings of history.
I’m a little afraid of what John Wilkes Booth will shoot Lincoln in the head with…
See… that is why I need you here…
Ok…many good ones there I must say; but Star Whores does lend itself to some good character names; there’ll be many more but off the top of my head, so to speak – Hand Solo, Jabba the Slut, and my personal favourite, C3-Pee all Over me.
It writes itself… but I think that is a real porn movie…
It would surprise me…that you know a lot about this kind of thing…
What about STAR-shaped genital WARtS…?
oh man… what about them?
They’re taking over the universe and need stopping one sexual encounter at a time!
That sounds like a lot of work.
It was your idea…and I have a feeling that it might be pleasurable work…
Hard work… so to speak…
You move too quickly! I don’t read you for a day & you’re already moving ahead with the script without taking my ideas into account. Wait for me (huff, puff . . .)
I get caught up in this stuff.
For the truly kinked…”Alpaca Lips Now”…a slightly twisted tale of animal husbandry.
make that, ‘animal husbandry, a god complex, and lots and lots of uniforms.’
Okay, you are on the list… I hope you are proud of yourself…
my only regret is that Brando didn’t live long enough to see it. Think Duvall might want a cameo?
I will see what we can do.
I may have to add that…