Happy birthday, America, from me and my dog, Shiloh… you don’t look a day over 175… and I hope you saved the gift receipt for Donald Trump… so you can return him…

I got all my tikis out and decorated the yard, because we had a small party. Okay, I didn’t make the fire god fireplace… that was a Father’s Day gift… and technically speaking, that other thing that I did make is really more of a totem pole… sort of…

Okay, that’s more like it… I even put the one I am carving that looks just like me… can you spot him?

Willie, our godson, was there… look how big he is getting! He was swimming around naked as a fish.

And my little buddy, Olivia, was there… she is learning so many words.

And of course I was wearing the monkey shirt, because Olivia loves it… even though my wife hates it… and of course I put on a pirate hat and whipped out my swashbuckling hotdog-roasting/marshmallow-toasting barbeque cutlass… because nothing says Fourth Of July like… uh… pirate stuff.

The thing is… (hey, I haven’t had a thing for a while)… but I am going on a big adventure. I know, I don’t usually tell you when I do that… for security reasons… but my house will be well-guarded. There will be people there… so stay away…

I don’t even have time to post all the pictures of this party. But I will when I get back… in… a while… and I will have a shi… a boatload of pictures and stories then.

See ya!