It is, as a matter of fact, one of those expressions that pops up and somehow worms its way into the public consciousness, being used often enough that there is some slight danger that the people at The Webster Dictionary Corporation will end up deciding to put it in their book and make it real.
Like all fashionable or trendy things, I am of the opinion that only the very first person … the ‘inventor’, if you will… who used the invention deserves any credit at all, and even then it is only recognition that they did something new, not necessarily that they did something good. The first person to go out of his house with a multi-colored, three-foot-tall Mohawk haircut was sort of awesome… all the rest of them are just trend followers with no imagination… (Are you paying attention, young guys who are right now walking around with their underwear hanging out above the top of their pants???)
So, anyway, some somewhat clever soul decided to pronounce the already overused ‘Oh my God’… (henceforth in this post to be shortened to; ‘OMG’)… as ‘ermagerd’… an idea which basically took an already bad idea and made it even more annoying, but slightly amusing for a few days… and all it requires is to say ‘OMG’ without moving your lips quite so much, adding a few ‘R’s’, and changing the vowel sounds.
As an historical note for those of you who have never been to America… particularly the South part of the West part of it… both ‘ermagerd’ and OMG are most often utilized by young females, and they are spoken in a long, drawn out manner, with either a viciously disdainful tone or as an extended exhalation full of judgmental disappointment. Conversely, it can be stated in an upbeat, sing-song manner to denote happy surprise and expectation.
Be that as it may, the thing is… what, you thought I was going to do all that clever lead-in and not have a thing???… but the thing is that, even though I think that ‘ermagerd’ has already begun to go the way of the dinosaurs… that is, become extinct… I feel it is my duty to point out how underutilized this obnoxious little word was by showing you all how much more you could have done with it if you had really tried… and if you had crack squirrels in your head like I do.
Here, for your entertainment, are a few new and improved versions of the dreaded ‘ermagerd’… with the definitions provided… feel free to use them in conversation… as long as you don’t do it anywhere near me;
- Germagerd… OMG, I think I’m sick!
- Spermagerd… OMG, I think I’m pregnant!
- Spurmagerd… OMG, I really like to ride horses! (Be careful that people do not get confused when you use number 2 and number 3, because they are pronounced identically)
- Insurmagerd… OMG, I just hit that car with my car, I really wish I had some insurance!
- Ensurmagerd… OMG, I am so old I should be drinking Ensure, so why am I still talking like this?
- Blurmagerd… OMG, I really need glasses!
- Stirmagerd… OMG, I really like to cook!
- Sirmagerd… OMG… (when addressing Royalty.)
- Shurmagerd… OMG, I am like totally so sure!
- Firmagerd… OMG, look at the muscles on that guy!
- Wormagerd… OMG, that guy is such a worm!
- Squirmagerd… OMG, that wormagerd totally makes my skin crawl!
- Hermagerd… OMG, look at her, do you believe what she is doing/wearing?
- Furmagerd… OMG, I really love cats/dogs/hamsters!
- Slurmagerd… OMG, I am so drunk I can’t talk!
- Dermagerd… OMG, my skin is so soft!
- Termagerd… OMG, that elected official should never be allowed to stay in office for decades because he is obviously incompetent and deceitful and corrupt, and we should really enact some legislation to limit the number of times those guys can keep getting elected!
- Nevermagerd… OMG, I am never using the word ‘ermagerd’ again!
(Remember; you don’t have to say the whole sentence, because each word means all that and more. You just have to say the word. I am sure people will be able to figure out exactly what you mean even if they never heard of my blog. In fact, I think this whole idea is so brilliant that I now may try to condense every complete sentence in the English language down into one short word. Think of all the time we will save!)
Pouring My Art Out 
murmergerd – OMG – I have no idea what he just said
HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Furmagerd! Duncan made me say that. Now I must vacuum.
vacurmagerd…
There are two “Us” I believe.
Not the way I made it up
Artmargerd! What have you done? That is hilarious. I have one complaint though “Firmagerd”. You see you have used the “m” that is a part of the “Ermagerd”. as a part of your word “Firm”. Using the “m” to do double duty is not acceptable Art. I find that etymologically objectionable. As a word purist (and if Doob was here I am sure he would agree) and ardent tree lover, I would say that Firmagerd would mean “OMG, Look at the size of that Fir Tree!” We up here in the north take our tree etymology very seriously. 😀
But ‘firmmagerd’ just looks too… pompous…
This is brilliant. You need to put these in the next appropriate book that you write.
I hope to never write a book where any of these would be appropriate… ha!
We need to get all of these on Urban Dictionary. Step 2: take over the English language. Step 4: PROFIT
Yeah, we don’t even need a step three with a plan like that!
Third steps are for plans that fail!
I like baby steps…
Small steps are also good.
It is all about leading with your head so gravity can help out.
Gravity is just a theory. It can fail at any time!
I seen that happen… in bars…
In bars or behind them?
both… but shhhh… not here…
I sat at the “cool kids” table in high school (You know, the kids that rode skateboards and listened to Nirvana and The Dead Kennedies and stuff) We always made fun of the “Valley Girls” table, who we referred to as “The Ohmygods.” (They of course, thought they were the cool kids but we knew better.) A particularly brutal, yet good natured insult among my friends would be to say to someone: “Ha! HA! You made out with one of the Ohmygods!!!” (This never failed to arouse laughter from everyone except for whichever one was being roasted at the time.)
I think OMG vanished… or at least became very rare… after the demise of the valley girls… and then came back as a teen thing that got taken over by the twenty-somethings and hipsters… or something…
Ermagird – OMG, I’m fat!!!
HA! ermabird is the word
Turdmargerd! – – ‘Oh look, I can see the Lord’s face in my shit!’
Oh man…
I’ll let myself out
That was awesome.