***(We interrupt our regularly scheduled weirdness for this important post by… some other guy… Please join me after this special presentation to discuss where you should direct any questions, swear words, lawsuits or one-finger salutes… Pouringmyartout.)***
Greetings and salutations.
Please excuse my exuberance, but I’m only f%*£ing guest blogging on Pouring My Art Out!!!!!!!!!!!!!
To most mere mortals this would be the epitome of their blogging career; a chance to sit back and spread across their face the smugness that comes from knowing you’ve made it. For me however, it’s far more important than that.
My name is Trenton Babbage and some of you may remember me from the 27th May, 2012………no? allow me to elucidate; this comment from some bloke called Sacha Inchi linked to the wonder that is Pouring My Art Out Audio Blog – the OFFICIAL SITE for the purchase of the WORLD’S GREATEST BLOG™ – Pouring My Art Out – on Audio Tape: a heady mix of art, social commentary, humour and family insight that will leave your mind working, jaw aching and your sides split!
My first post gave details of the product, a few reviews, and the extremely flexible payment options (and a small plea for buyers as sales were initially slower than expected).
Felicity from New York said
“I’m blind, but wanted to read stuff that’s really funny, so I bought my copy of PMAO Audio Blog as soon as I heard about it; I’ve never looked back.”
Then disaster struck! I was forced to leave my home by a wife (she was my wife; not just a random one) who just didn’t see the glory that was PMAO; I admit now that asking her to call me ‘Arthur’ whilst in the throws of passion was a step too far, but I stand by the naming of my children – Arthur1, Arthur2 and Arthuretta. My Publisher’s Apology details the lengths I was forced to go to make ends meet.
Dotty Headbanger from Yorkshire said
“I’ll have one copy. I’ll give you the stamp to post it if you send me a S.A.E. for me to send you the stamp in.”
I was at a loss, at a crossroads, ativan; I’d put so much of myself into the audio tapes that to see them fail was too much for me…I turned to Jesus but he just offered me cake; I turned to Buddha but he simply wouldn’t shut up; I turned to Allah but was arrested by the americans; I turned to Zarathustra but he just kept repeating himself; so finally I turned to myself, I went RuPaul on my arse………I went back to my roots with the audio tapes, but this time I would spread the word through the wonder that is YouTube.
Thus I assembled a crack team of Tom Cruise lookalikes to be my voice-over artists. I have a number on the books, and the blog at the moment showcases two of them – Jefferson Grey-MacTavish and Hatchet Carmichael – but there will be many more as time progresses. Hatchet’s reading of Arthur’s very first post can be listened to below.
***WARNING*** He has a brummie accent!!
I hope you enjoyed that, and I bet you’re glad the words were included…
One of the many things that makes Pouring My Art Out (WORLD’S GREATEST BLOG™) the WORLD’S GREATEST BLOG™ is its interactivity, and the audio blog is no different in this regard; Jefferson’s first reading has yet to be decided…do you have a favourite post that you’d like to hear a Scotsman read out? (I defy anybody to find that phrase anywhere else on the internet!). Hatchet is also more than in need of the money to read another post, and as I say, more readers will be added soon.
So please comment your suggestions on this blog or mine, and thy will be done.
Kind regards and Happy Listening!
Trenton Babbage
P.S. My blog – Trenton Babbage Enterprises Ltd PPL & Co. – is not just about Arthur (if you’re reading this, then he hasn’t vetted it; make the most of it before he notices!), I have many other interesting and exciting things to offer; such as my collection of dancing cabbages – Trenton Babbage’s Dancing Cabbages; and my offer to answer any question you’re having trouble in answering through the usual channels – if your usual channel is FOX, then there is very little I can do for you.
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(My name is Pouring my art out, and I endorse this message… I think… This is the first time I ever let someone else get their greasy paws on my blo… had a guest blogger on my blog. You may have some questions… I know I do… But how awesome is it that someone likes my stuff enough to go to all the trouble to do this… whatever the hell this is…??? Now go to the links. That is where the weirdness is. Those aren’t fake links just for show. Those are real links to magic and wonder and… stuff)
Pouring My Art Out 
Ha! And here i thought this would be a Bowie post (as I have one called “Waiting for the Gift of Sound & Vision).
It was a cynical attempt to garner David Bowie fans into my fold…may I have the link to your Bowie post?
Well OK – http://themercenaryresearcher.wordpress.com/2012/09/17/i-will-sit-right-down-waiting-for-the-gift-of-sound-vision/
It succeeded!
I haven’t clicked on it yet……
woe unto you.
Love. Congratulations on breaking into this blog!
I wish my name was Dotty Headbanger.
Thank you; it’s taken quite a long time and a number of false identities, but I made it!
My apologies but there is only one Dotty Headbanger, and she lives here – http://dottyheadbanger.wordpress.com/660-2/about/ – be warned……
Mazel tov, Mr. Babbage, on your guest blogging appearance—I understand that the competition was mighty fierce, but kudos to you on your victory. As for Mr. Hatchet Carmichael, his reading of Arthur’s first post was stirring and riveting, and I wept great big tears. As it happens, those great big tears helped dislodge an eyelash that had been stuck in my eye all day, so I am in his debt forever.
Madame Weebles! A thousand many thanks for your appearance here today; and you are correct regarding the competition; I had to skewer a cooking blog, out-draw an art blog, snap a photography blog in half and beat the sh*t out of a politics blog…and let me tell you, there was a sh*t load of sh*t in there!
I shall pass on your debt to Hatchet, and remember; if you would like anything read by the man, you only have to ask.
Oh barf! You’re everywhere! Are you following me?!
I don’t imagine you make that complaint about the air…? And I know some things about the air that would turn your stomach!
ahaha! you know you rock
I do know this…but it’s trying to convince others; they simply won’t take my word for it; it’s like they’ve got minds of their own.
Well we must spread the word then! lol
I have forty-seven failed blogs……I’m tired.
keep going one won’t probably this one!
Your comment makes no sense…please advise.
lol keep going this one will be a success!
Boll**ks is that what you said!!!
It’s what I tried to say but apparently not what came out of my typing fingers. I really mean it
I know…who wouldn’t think that? Thank you for your support.
right who wouldn’t 😉
Hey cabbage, I sent you an email did you get it? wanted to confirm that your submission to wePoets is your voice. We just have to be careful with copy writes
I did, and I have replied; I steal everything; don’t trust a word I have to say!
ahaha okay!
Lets face it, if someone is trying to up their image, they could do worse than be seen with you.
Unless you’re doing that thing with the cheez whiz and lemon merengue…
HAVE YOU NO SHAME???
Listen to the big wave…it’s eating a little man! If you’re doing that thing with the cheez whiz and the lemon meringue, then no-one’s looking at me!
ahaha!
Listen to the big wave…it’s eating a little man! If you’re doing that thing with the cheez whiz and the lemon meringue, then no-one’s looking at me!
i have no idea what you two crazies are talking about!
I think she’s talking to you.
or all of you
or both of you
Reblogged this on The Seed Said So and commented:
I can’t believe it! My dear passing acquaintance Trenton’s lifelong dream has finally been fulfilled; he’s guest blogged on Pouring My Art Out…I’ve gone all wibbly…go check them out.
Reblogged this on TBE ltd ppl & co and commented:
I’ve done it…for all you dissenters, for all you naysayers, for all those who said, “Why don’t you do something productive with your life?”, “Please come to bed; I’ve got hold of those twins you like!”, “Do the words ‘Restraining Order’ mean nothing to you?” well I say this to you: I have guest blogged on Pouring My Art Out…so go me!