And now, the top ten reasons why you should waste, uh, I mean spend your valuable time reading my blog from the very beginning… (and click the follow button way down there at the bottom of the page, if you haven’t already)…
10. Because my blog comes with a money back guarantee…
9. Because you will never meet anyone stranger than me… (You can count yourself lucky if you meet two or three people as strange as me in your entire life)…
8. You can read an actual letter from William Shakespeare to Sam I Am explaining why he declined the invitation to sample green eggs and ham… (As a free bonus you can find out what happened to the Cat in the Hat when he let himself go)…
7. The best near-death-experience stories of all times, and I haven’t told them all yet…
6. Baby pictures. Who doesn’t like baby pictures? Plus pictures of my adorable daughters… (like that one of Mollie walking with me when she was younger featured above)… And pictures and stories of my youth. My life is an open book… a strange, weird, improbable, funny book…
5. Because I pour out my art… (hence the name of this blog)… and my heart and my soul, over and over again, just for your entertainment…
4. You can learn why Photoshop is better than real life…
3. You can find out why Conan the barbarian can be trusted to babysit your kids, and what he would look like wearing tie dye, and why we all have a little barbarian inside of us…
2. Because if you have a broken leg or a bad tummy flu, and your TV is not working, why not spend a little time getting to know me? I go exceptionally well with pain medications…
1. You will make me happy, and then I will no doubt read your entire blog, and sharing is what love is all about…
Pouring My Art Out 
Wonderful marketing job.
Self promotion and no shame, that’s my secret.
Be careful, they say you only get 4 near deaths, the fifth is real. ;-).
By the way, you forgot reason 11 . You gain your own personal stalker.
I have passed my limit of NDE’s…
And I am easy to stalk, because I am here all the time.
I hope you don’t take us in the bathroom with you. 😉
I don’t even take me in the bathroom with me…
Ooohhh… Shakespeare and Dr. Seuss? Why didn’t you tell me before?
It is all part of my ongoing attempt to lure innocent victims into my twisted little world.
I only have one near-death experience, but I have several near-life experiences. Oh, thanks for visiting my blog.
P.S. Strange like relativity is relative.
It’s all relative… Thanks.
Have you ever considered that each of your near death experiences actually led to death and you’re just a Bruce Wilis in a Haley Joel Osmont fantasy world?
I am the most interesting dead man in the world!
Stay breathing, my friends…
I’ve read your entire blog. I think you should give me a prize.
Dotty Headbanger should get one too because she’s been following you from the very beginning.
One more thing, love the photo of a little girl with her dad.
My butt looks droopy… sigh.
Okay, it’s not all about you and your southbound rear end. It’s about the little girl. We’re not even looking at you!
But I am the center of many universes!
OK, that’s really Berkeley that’s the center of many universes… I am just the center of a few… sigh…
Did you take test?
Will I get a prize if I do?
I will know you aren’t just faking it…
No, you won’t know. My super powers will prevent you from knowing.
Oh anyone can say they have super powers…
If you have x-ray vision, you should be able to look right through the earth and see me in my chair typing… and snickering…
I can’t see you because I have my hands over my laser eyes. Be careful because if you keep snickering I might tip your chair right over, with powerful thoughts, and you’ll land on your droopy derriere.
It’s the shorts that make it look droopy. I just don’t have one, or so they tell me.
I’m sure you probably used to have one, just like I did. After age 40 muscle mass departs at an alarming rate.
To reiterate- we didn’t notice because we were looking at Mollie.
I made her bigger so you could see her better.
I saw her this morning while you were still asleep.
They grow up so fast.
You are so whacked. It’s the only reason I follow you.
I had a run in with a weed whacker… that’s how I got whacked…
I’m sold! Great pic too! It’s kind of got me humming the “Andy Griffith Show” tune. Yes, I am that old… but they were re-runs! I swear!
I love Barney Fife, I ain’t scared to admit it, dang it…
Dear pmao,
Been there, done that. 🙂
Love Dotty xxx
Ha…
But I have met people stranger than you! Some of them are on WordPress and some of them are my multiple personalities. Have you met us yet? There is Ginger, Snapp, and sometimes a chick named Mollie comes around( mollie is the one in charge, but don’t tell the others).
How much money do I get back if this doesn’t work out between us?
Every dime you put in, you get back. And if you think people, even the extra ones in your head, are stranger than me, there are two reasons for this. First, I have not got to the weirdest things about me yet, because I am building to a climax. Secondly, I have to keep this blog family and kid friendly because I hope to pass it on to my heirs someday, so I am hampered by the fact that I can’t air all my dirty laundry… (Get it, hampered… dirty laundry… it’s a joke)…
You had me at climax and at your dirty joke. ( Get it? Climax… Dirty joke…. Hampers)
I’m staying.
OK, I don’t know yet if you are as strange as me, but you are as funny as me, that’s for sure…
I like no 10 the best. I’m not brave enough to do a money back guarantee on my blog.
How about insurance, then? Are you well covered?