…Sorry for the delay, but I had to pick myself up off the floor and get my laughter under control.
Like many artists, (and most socially inept sociopaths), I never get tired of talking about myself. It is always all about me!
On the other hand, this is all about my art, not just Art in general…(that was a joke, sort of)… The good news is that I am not all that interesting (once you remove the art from the Art) so we can get through this rather quickly. Thank you for bearing with me, if indeed you have.
Here are some interesting facts about me. In fact theses facts are the only interesting facts about me;
1. I have had more near-death experiences in my life than anyone else I have met. Stick around long enough and you will probably hear them all…
2. I actually am 6 feet 4 inches tall. I know every guy on the internet says they are, but I really am. What does this have to do with anything? Not a lot. It means that before I got married I could date short or tall girls. Also, I can find my car in big parking lots. Mostly it means I get asked to take things down from high shelves.
3. I have a missing tooth… I don’t mean it fell out, I mean I was born without it…
There should not be an uneven number of teeth between your canine teeth. I don’t know where the missing tooth ended up. Hopefully not in my spleen, or slowly growing up through my skull towards my brain. It just occurred to me that the Tooth Fairy owes me some cash.
4. Dogs and babies love me. Don’t trust anyone to whom this does not apply.
5. My legs are still in great shape. And I look alright when I shave and dress up…
6. I cannot pronounce the word ‘sixth’…
7. And last but not least, I believe that Photoshop is way better than real life… Because in real life you can’t do things like this just for the fun of it…
(That baby is not me…I looked more like a wax monkey when I was that age, and he is trusted to not wear a bib,… but we do have similar taste in hats)…
You can also do things to other family members…(they should be aware of this, and not allow themselves to be photographed…ever)
Why is Uncle Bert perched on my daughter’s nose??? Because I can, that’s why…
I am so sorry Jessica… If everybody didn’t know how beautiful you are, this would be mean… (Never make me angry again, seriously…)…
I have now cleaned out my old Photoshop files, and we can finally move on…
Pouring My Art Out 
My five year old stumbled out of her bedroom and climbed up next to me on the couch while I was looking at this post. She looked at the picture of the Viking baby and said (and I quote), “What the?” I’m not sure how I feel about this.
Yes, I am too old to have a five year old, but there you go. Also I cannot pronounce “ask”. It always comes out “aks”. This is a source of great shame for me, but I do feel better now that I have come out of the internet closet, so thank you for that.
You can always come to me with your confessions… I have plenty to be ashamed of… and I can’t pronounce the word 6th… or sixth… also, this blog is almost entirely family-friendly… almost… I try to put a warning label up when it isn’t.
Right now she is sitting on the floor playing a game of her own devising that involves portals, traps, and Scully from Monsters Inc. growling unseen from level 70. Me, I used to just play house.
I am still playing house…
Also, 5 is the perfect age to read my monkey book… just saying
I plan on checking out the monkey book and all the other books. I promised, didn’t I? Besides, judging by the cover it really does look perfect for a five year old girl I once referred to as Monkey Feet. Did I mention that, as a baby, she looked remarkably like an orangutan?
no… but I have monkey feet… size 15 monkey feet…
I’m liking these early flashbacks. Some I missed.
mmmmm… flashbacks….
Ehr. Meh Gerd. You should have replaced me in the Duel.
Nobody can replace you, Ed.
But they should have, is my point.
Ed, you are the first person I am answering on our new IPad…
YEAH! FIRST! Eat that, other jealous readers.
You know what? If I win that Samsung Galaxy, you will be the first person I answer on THAT.
I want to be your first, Ed….
You’ll be my first in the whole Galaxy. That’s a double pun, because of your book and the Samsung. I just Scrabbled life!
Yeah you did.
Reblogged this on Pouring My Art Out and commented:
Recycling to keep the planet clean…
#4 is totally true.
Sixth *is* difficult to pronounce. I can’t say ‘prairie’ and it comes out as ‘pear-y’.
You really love your Photoshop, huh?
Photoshop was just one artistic phase, but it is fun.
You crack me up! You are a dork!
I have gone over to the dork side.
The dark side is even more fun.
Light and dark work together. They need each other.
i also have a missing tooth; it’s one of the back ones though, so the annotations and fluorescent pointers can’t be seen without tools
Dear pmao,
I found your missing tooth! Your poor daughter has it. Are those eyebrows yours too?
Love Dotty xxx
Never anger a man who does Photoshop… the lesson is clear…