Your supreme leader speaks!

Now that I am running things, I have just a few more rules to lay down. Do not feel like I am picking on you humans and your lovely little planet. These rules apply on every planet in every universe in every dimension.

1. Stop looking for diet pills. These are dangerous. There is no easy shortcut that is safe. Just eat a little less and move a little more. Or be happy with the way you are.

2. Do not take pills that have side affects that are worse than what they cure. Swapping a headache or back pain for anal leakage is never going to be a good trade.

3. Stop dressing your dogs up in cute little outfits and costumes. I guess if you live where it is really cold, you can put a sweater on the dog, but you should have just gotten a dog that doesn’t mind the cold. Like a Husky.

4. Condo people! Say hi to each other. Introduce yourself to a neighbor. Stop going into your condominiums through the garage so you don’t have to see other people. The right time to meet the people you live that close to is not when the cops show up because a car got broken into and everybody comes outside to see what is going on. You should be ashamed of yourselves. Do it, or I will get rid of all the condos! Nobody will miss them.

About pouringmyartout

You will laugh at my antics... That is my solemn promise to you... Or your money back... Stop on by...
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251 Responses to Your supreme leader speaks!

  1. benzeknees says:

    Hear, hear for the new rules! I live in an apartment condo rented to us by the owner. We met our neighbors on one side the week after we moved in because we rented their spare parking space. Our neighbors are an elderly couple with health issues & the son who has cerebral palsy lives with them. The other morning, very early, hubby heard a tiny knock at our door. When he opened it in his PJ bottoms it was our neighbor’s son – his father had fallen down & he was unable to get him back up. Hubby went over as he was & got the old man up & made sure he was OK before leaving.

  2. please get rid of all condo’s i hate them! anal leakage??? what pills are you on? You’re a supreme something….

  3. Would it appease you, O Great One, if I offer chocolate and adult beverages? Maybe it could help to entice those people out of their condos to socialize, in a not-the-cops-are-here way….

  4. Ooo…you have restless subjects oh great one; when people are invited to listen to opinions they are very amenable, make them law and they don’t really like that…I however, would follow you anywhere.

  5. Reblogged this on welcometosuccess and commented:
    Reblogging! 🙂

  6. MyADDMoment says:

    I’m glad you’re running things now and anal leakage is never a good thing!!
    ☺ MAM

  7. 4: living in NYC I ever knew you lived next door, it’s like we would wait til the other left their place to get into the elevator.
    I put a backpack on my dog, he carried my keys, cellphone and his own water.

  8. Mancakes says:

    So what you’re saying is that you, Supreme Leader, will not be bringing back ephedra??? This BLOWS. I shall overthrow you for this.

  9. Trent Lewin says:

    I think you are underestimating the wonders of anal leakage. Also, we as a people (Canadians) are offended by your remarks on the subject of dogs. We too deserve to have cute fur-free dogs in this climate. You cannot take this right away from us. Continue on this path and a savage army of flaming beavers will descend upon you.

  10. joehoover says:

    When did this happen? I’ve been gone too long.

  11. londenberg1 says:

    pretty cool, just busy as sadness fall upon the tragedy in Boston. Many morn & cry out & pray. as for me, a different approach as taken shape…as I light this first candle, bring from darkness the evil doers responsible, 1 candle, 2 candle 3 candle more, shine justice & light upon the blood which has been poured. north wind, mother earth & darkness of night fall-may those evil doers be bound to my spell & may poison rot into their bones as cancer sets in until justice has found, 1 candle 2 candle 3 candle bound. sincerely from the writer of LondenBerg by Lord Biron

    • Thank you. I sometimes take refuge in siliness when the woes of the world become too much for me to bear. People far brighter than me will cast scorn upon these evil-doers. Like you.

  12. hiddinsight says:

    My dog has a rain coat. It’s easier. May I still live O Great Alien?

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